Oct. 25, 2022

Why It's Never Too Late to Start Over Again with Brian Ondrako

Why It's Never Too Late to Start Over Again with Brian Ondrako

Our guest is the host of the Just Get Started podcast, Brian Ondrako.


About This Episode

Do you have goals you want to accomplish that you have been putting off? Sometimes, you need to just get started. How do you do that? Well, we decided to ask Just Get Started podcast host, Brian Ondrako.

Today, we speak to Brian about how he helps inspire people on the cusp of getting started on their path toward happiness. According to Brian, happiness is the result of making consistent decisions that align with your vision for your life, not attaining any specific goal.

Unless you have a clear idea of which way to go, seeking happiness is almost irrelevant, which is why Brian recommends finding your North Star and taking incremental steps toward it. He also highlights the value of welcoming discomfort, staying curious, and embracing vulnerability along the way, which you’ll learn more about in this episode.

Ultimately, it's not about reaching your North Star. It's about keeping the compass pointed in the right direction. If you want to find out how to stop wishing for change and start making it happen, tune in today!

Topics discussed in this episode:

  • We get vulnerable about where we are in our own journeys
  • How Brian got started on his mission to help others
  • Why you have to discover yourself to discover happiness
  • The joy that can come from putting action in motion
  • Why taking incremental steps toward your North Star is key
  • Understanding the value of sharing your setbacks with others
  • Overcoming fear and complacency with curiosity
  • How you can benefit from embracing discomfort
  • Advice for taking that first step by looking back at childhood
  • How Brian encourages people to pursue their North Star
  • A reminder that it’s your choice to change your behavior
  • Tips for finding the simplest path forward

Don’t let the conversation end there. Join us in our Facebook Group where you and fellow Fit Mess listeners can connect for monthly challenges, accountability to reach your goals, and a supportive community. 

Like this show? Please leave us a review here – even one sentence helps! Post a screenshot of you listening on Instagram & tag us so we can thank you personally!

Don’t let the conversation end there. Join us in our Facebook Group where you and fellow Fit Mess listeners can connect for monthly challenges, accountability to reach your goals, and a supportive community. 

Like this show? Please leave us a review here – even one sentence helps! Post a screenshot of you listening on Instagram & tag us so we can thank you personally!

Resources:

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Transcript

[00:00:00] Jeremy: Coming up today on the fit mess. 

[00:00:02] Brian: Once I realized that I know almost nothing about almost everything, it allowed me and, and again it, I had to really, um, I had to really push the ego down and really become more humble. and be more grateful about what I had. And what it allowed me to do was really expose my mind to, Okay, what's out there are, are my beliefs the correct things or could they be wrong?

[00:00:29] Zach: That's Brian and Draco. He's the host of the Just Get Started podcast Today we'll talk with him about how he helps inspire people that are on the cusp of getting started on their path towards happiness. 

[00:00:40] 

[00:01:00] Jeremy: All right. Well, we're all about vulnerability here, right? We we wanna share the pains, the bumps, the bruises, all the things. So without complaining too much, 

[00:01:08] I just wanna share. For me, the last few weeks have been 

[00:01:12] particularly rough. I feel like summer was a speed bump in my 

[00:01:15] life of a year. That started really well.

[00:01:18] I, I got things under control. I had routines in place. I was really on 

[00:01:22] on a path that I felt good about. I was able to look in the mirror at several points and not completely hate 

[00:01:28] who I saw. It was great, but then my routines fell outta 

[00:01:32] place and all the things that I do to sort of manage everyth. Got to be too much.

[00:01:38] And they, and they fell to the side, and it was, it was hard. It was, it was a struggle. You know, Zach, I know you are at a place in your life where you're feeling happier than you've ever been. You're in the best shape of your life. I've, I've heard you say it several times now, and I keep getting jealous of that. I'm just like, Fuck, how does he do it?

[00:01:54] That's amazing. I want, I want more of that in my life. I, I feel like I can't do anything. Right. And so really just in the last few days, I decided that it's just time to start over. It's okay to just acknowledge that I'm the dummy in the room. I don't know what I'm doing. And that led me back to some of my basics. A lot of this journey began for me on the yoga mat, so I got that out, dusted it off. I've been using some of that. 

[00:02:19] I've spent more time in more cold water, just trying to feel better, and I can already feel a difference in the last few days, I'm feeling more at ease. and it's because I'm making room for myself.

[00:02:29] And it's just so interesting because I, I'm, you know, realizing just in, in the context of the interview that we're about to. So much of this was just about me starting again. I had stopped 

[00:02:39] Jeremy: so many things and was just kind of keeping the wheel moving, keeping that hamster wheel spinning, and I had to find ways to start taking care of 

[00:02:46] myself and I, it did.

[00:02:48] I'd had to just go back to basics and do some of the simple things that opened some of the early doors for me that really led to us doing the show and doing all the different things that we do to try and inspire others to help take care of themselves.

[00:02:59] Zach: And you'll get it back. I mean, in, in this journey again, it, and it is a journey. It's, it's ups and downs. It's, it's, you know, success and failure. It's not all. You know, shininess and, and goodness and always the best, right? Um, and you're right, I do say a lot that I am the happiest and in the best shape of my life in my entire life.

[00:03:20] But again, remember I was so ha unhappy for so long in my life that like me being the happiest I've, I've been in my entire life, like it doesn't mean I'm happy all the time. It means that I'm better than I was, and that's my goal to be better than I was yesterday. And be better tomorrow than I am today.

[00:03:40] So, you know, again, I, I heard you say I'm jealous of that and I think you can get there. But like All you have to do is be more happy tomorrow than you were today. Yeah, and that's it. 

[00:03:52] Jeremy: and, and also, how many times do we get on these microphones and say, Don't compare yourselves to others. You don't know what shit they're going through. And all like, and I'm so like conscious and so aware of it, but when you're down, when you feel like the world's, you know, stacked against you and, and you're just letting all of the excuses and all the victim shit take over, it's so hard not to look at.

[00:04:13] You perceive as success of others and just be like, Why can't I have that? This sucks.

[00:04:18] Zach: Well, and to be, to be fair, right? I mean, think about my situation. I am, I wouldn't say newly divorced anymore because it's been a little while, but I live half of the week by myself. My daughter is with my ex-wife. Half of the week. So I literally have three and a half days every week where it's just me and I can focus on me, and I can put a ton of time in there on just me.

[00:04:43] So the situations are very, very different. 

[00:04:46] Jeremy: right, And, and this is, and the point isn't to, to, uh, highlight comparison. That definitely is something 

[00:04:51] that I think gets in the way for a lot of people. But I just want 

[00:04:54] to, uh, I wanna make sure 

[00:04:56] that anybody listening to this, and I think you'll get this from the 

[00:04:59] interview, is that you probably know 

[00:05:02] what you need to 

[00:05:03] do to bring more joy to your life.

[00:05:05] You probably know the pain points and the 

[00:05:07] things that get in the way, and all of the reasons that you're not accomplishing the things that you wanna. 

[00:05:12] You probably come up with a million 

[00:05:13] excuses every day not to do them and find ways not to 

[00:05:16] get around to doing that thing. But I mean, I'm, 

[00:05:19] I'm so far, I mean, it's, it's a week.

[00:05:22] I don't wanna, I don't want to, you 

[00:05:23] know, promise the moon here or anything, 

[00:05:26] but I'm feeling better by just starting again by just dipping my toes in the water, Like literally and figuratively, just trying to find little moments of. And with that is coming, the cascading effects of just feeling better, sleeping better, deciding to make better choices in the kitchen.

[00:05:43] Like all these little things, just by doing a couple things differently is starting to blow those doors open again. Where, you know, if, if we were talking last week, I would be just miserable and feeling like, 

[00:05:53] you know, life's never gonna get any 

[00:05:54] better. 

[00:05:55] Zach: We talk all the time about making sure that you've got time for yourself and to, and to make that time if you don't have it. And that means not pleasing everyone else. Right. In order to make 

[00:06:05] sure you're, you're okay. Um, I can speak about, you know, one thing that I've been struggling with lately that's, you know, definitely not the same as what you're feeling, but, um, I've been in, in, you know, I get up stupid early, you know this.

[00:06:19] I get up at four 30 in the morning and to the point now where I don't even use an alarm clock, 4 28 hits, and like my eyes start peeling open and I'm up and I go to the gym at five 15. Beat the shit outta myself for an hour and I love it. 

[00:06:35] Um, or I go to yoga and then I come home and then my day starts, and that is like, you know, critical for me.

[00:06:43] Um, but lately I've been having, you know, situations where I've been staying up too late. I've been staying up 

[00:06:49] till 10, 11 o'clock at night. And when you get up at four 30, 

[00:06:53] you gotta go to bed by eight. You really 

[00:06:55] do. 

[00:06:55] Jeremy: Yeah. 

[00:06:56] Zach: So I've been staying up too late and then I've been, uh, I haven't either, I make the workout and then.

[00:07:01] Dog ass tired all day or I don't make the workout and I'm dog 

[00:07:05] ass tired all day cause I didn't work out. And then it compounds and it keeps going and going and going. And those, that situation that's keeping me up late, like I had to, I have to put my foot down and say no more. This isn't happening. I don't, I don't care what the benefit is.

[00:07:22] I don't care what the thing is. These are the things that keep me going all day and I need to, I need to have those boundaries. But even on those days where I am dog ass tired, you know, I still take my athletic greens because, I mean, E I'm not getting my sleep. I at least need to get my nutrients, and that stuff is just amazing. 

[00:07:40] Jeremy: It's packed with 75 high quality vitamins and minerals. It works with any diet plan and it tastes great. And for less than three bucks a day, you're investing in your health for a lot less than your cabinet full of vitamins. So reclaim your health now with convenient daily nutrition to make it easy. Athletic greens is gonna give you a free year supply of immune supporting vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athletic greens.com/fit mess again, that's athletic greens.com/fit.

[00:08:08] Mess to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. You can also find that link on our website, the fit mess.com. All right. Well, taking your athletic greens, that's one way to get started, but there's 

[00:08:19] lots of different things, different goals, wishes, things you want to bring to your life that you have been putting off and you need to just get started. How do you do that? Well, we decided to ask the host of the Just Get Started podcast.

[00:08:29] His name is Brian and Draco, and we started by asking him what inspired him to start his mission of helping people and why it's so 

[00:08:36] important to.

[00:08:37] it'd be nice to kind of sit here and be like, Oh man, just get started. I've had this idea for so long and I've prodded and I've really worked at the reality is it was partial luck of how it came about, and I think that's maybe part of the journey that makes it fun.

[00:08:52] Brian: Um, so just as a background, right? So I, what I've discovered in this process for the last handful of years is that I'm a navigator and I help navigate people to just get started. And the core kind of thesis, I guess is that what I, what I realized after kind of looking back and discovering my own life and things that work well that didn't, you know, where I had my struggles was that I found that the only way we discover happiness is we first have to discover ourselves.

[00:09:19] I think we're, we're so used to kind of looking out into the, you know, the world and saying, Oh, what are other people doing? Or What's going on here? Or, you know, how, how does that feel there? All this stuff. But we have a hard time kind of sitting in thought and actually accepting what we actually like.

[00:09:34] What are the things that we believe in, the things that we wanna do, forget about anyone else, right? What are the things that we actually wanna do? So when I started actually realized, And a lot of things I'm doing today are because I've kind of reflection of sitting back and realizing like what makes me happy, the things that I want to do in life, and ultimately let's start making decisions that lead me down that path versus what I used to do.

[00:09:58] Growing up being a middle child and you know, kind of a small town feel. I didn't, I didn't, I was kind of in like this. Um, you know, I played small ball basically. I didn't feel like I could think big and kind of do a lot of things. And what I realized again later in life was that no, that, that was actually such a horrible way to think about it.

[00:10:15] But what it did was it gave me a lot of complacency. It gave me a lot of lack of confidence, you know, self-limiting beliefs. And I didn't realize until, again, just a few years ago that you know, I can make the choices and the decisions to become happier. And if there's things I want to do, I can go in that direction.

[00:10:32] I don't have to, you know, wait for someone else to do it. Um, If I land the plane here on this, um, is the way just get started came about. It's, it's kind of a cool story, is I wanted to start a podcast back in 2015. That's when I first kind of had the idea, I wanna start a podcast. And I went to a conference, um, and I met a guy named Adam Martin.

[00:10:55] He had a podcast called Makers of Sport. I'll give him a shout out. And we had talked about podcasting and we had talked about, you know, ideas and he gave me some thoughts and I'm like, Yeah man, I'm excited. I'm gonna start a podcast. A year goes by. 2016, I meet him again at the same conference. Does it start?

[00:11:13] I, I haven't started it yet. And he questions me on it and we're, I'm like, All right, I'm gonna do it this year. Another years go by and I see him in 2017 at the same conference. Now it's easy to say in a, in a conversation here quickly. Oh, two years. Like, like it evaporate. We know how. Slow the days can go by.

[00:11:29] So I just, I learned a lot. I was continuing to discover myself and, and you know, kind of figuring out what I liked and changing, you know, who I was, my mindset. So in 2017 and in the summer there, when I, I met him again, I said, This is the year I'm starting a podcast. Cuz I had built up the, kind of the gusto I guess, of like, All right, I'm ready to do this.

[00:11:48] And uh, and I said, You're gonna be a guest on it. And he's like, All right. And. I didn't have an idea, like I was gonna talk about the 49ers cause I'm a big 49ers fan. I was gonna talk about golf just cause I'm a big golfer and you know, I was thinking of ideas, but what I kept going back to was this, you know, whole idea of like entrepreneurship that was important to me and, and I said, man, there's gotta be a lot of people out there just like me, that for many years they have an idea and they don't do anything with it.

[00:12:15] Because I had done that in the past with other ideas. So I said, Man, what if I do a podcast? On this and maybe I bring on people. Cause I always wanted to do the interview. Like I grew up watching Regis and Kathy Lee with my grandmother and stuff. So, you know, I love the interview style. So I'm like, why don't I do an interview style and let's do a podcast about this and just get started, Kind of just popped in my head one day, like I just gotta get started.

[00:12:39] That's, and then it was just get started and then all of a sudden, what's funny is as I piece back my childhood and all this other stuff with my mentor Rich, and, and we started to figure out I was a navigator, just get started actually fit perfect because it actually is a culmination of all the things I didn't do in my life and realized that that's the, the cataclysmic moment is starting.

[00:13:01] We don't know what's gonna happen after that, but if we start, if we put some action in motion, All of a sudden, you know, great things can happen and we can be the happiest we've ever been. So that's kind of the genesis story. I bounced around there a little bit,

[00:13:12] Jeremy: No, no. That's okay. It, it is amazing how, how, just taking any action toward something. Takes you somewhere and, and I know this is, uh, uh, something that, that you believe in is this sort of idea of going after sort of the bigger North Star thing rather than a bunch of incremental goals.

[00:13:32] Brian: Yeah,

[00:13:33] Jeremy: Perhaps the two play together.

[00:13:34] But talk to me about the, the difference in why that's an important distinction.

[00:13:38] Brian: Yeah, I mean the, I feel the North Star. I kind of like that, um, that thought because we never technically reach it.

[00:13:45] Jeremy: Mm-hmm.

[00:13:46] Brian: Like there's no, I don't think there's a finish line. I mean, besides obviously death, right? There's no finish line of like, Oh, I reach this and now what? Like, I believe that it's like, alright, I wanna keep advancing.

[00:13:57] So if my mission is to help navigate people to just get started, I'm gonna be on that mission for the rest of my. The North Stars in the distance. What it helps me do though, is navigate myself to like, Oh yeah, maybe doing the podcast today or children's books today, but maybe tomorrow it's, I don't know, public speaking maybe, or maybe it's running of another, I don't know.

[00:14:17] There's all these things that could be done, but it's under that umbrella, so it doesn't pigeon hold me into like, Oh, I only can do X job and, and do this. No, it gives me a leverage to do a lot of different things leading toward that North Star. You.

[00:14:31] Jeremy: Yeah. And, and I think a lot of times we hear this all the time with goals, right? You, you set this goal, you achieve that goal, whether it's making x amount of money, losing 20 pounds, whatever the thing is, you hit that goal and you go, Aha, I, here I am

[00:14:43] Brian: Yeah.

[00:14:43] Jeremy: now what? And I feel like that's sort of the distinction here that's important, is that there's also, uh, this sort of feeling when, when it is something tangible, when there's a number of monetary value, whatever.

[00:14:57] It can be really discouraging to keep missing it. And if, if that bigger goal is something that you acknowledge, I will never, ever attain that, but it is just the direction I'm going. Does that sort of liberate some of that worry of, uh, dissatisfaction or, or, or like, you know, there are days when you're in the gym and you're just like, I gotta do this again tomorrow.

[00:15:18] This is the, this doesn't ever end. Does that help alleviate some of that for.

[00:15:23] Brian: You know, thinking about kind of the way you, you put that, I, I mean, I certainly set goals. But I think the goals are, I, I don't beat myself up if I don't achieve them. And that may sound weird cause it's like, well, what's the point of setting goals? My thing is like, well what, what are the reasons we like to, I think we, we all, we all live in this vacuum and we think like, okay, I want to do X so Y's gotta happen and then we're gonna get to Z.

[00:15:49] Like, it doesn't work that way. Life happens like, you know, we meet different people and that throws off off course or a new opportunity comes that again aligns with our mission. We have to say no to something else. Like things happen. Right. You know, having a 10 year old, like life happens and, you know, I gotta, you know, he, he is a priority, so I, you know, maybe some things come up and I have to push other things so I don't beat myself up if I don't.

[00:16:12] And my whole thing is like, am I putting the effort in to the things that I wanna do? And am I avoiding, is the the wrong term? But am I saying no? To things that aren't in line with my, and this is why it's so important for me to discover that purpose and file that North Star because I kind of at least know what decisions should I make or not be.

[00:16:33] Whereas before I just kind of said yes to almost everything. Cause I'm like, I don't know. Like sure. That sounds cool. Well, if it doesn't align, so go. Like you're, I love the gem analogy cause I know we talk about this when you're on my podcast, but just, you know, fitness is so important in my. You know, health and wellness and, and I like that whole idea that James Clear has with Atomic Habits is like, act like a healthy person.

[00:16:52] Make decisions like a healthy person. It you, it's not the, I wanna lose 20 pounds. If you keep making decisions like a healthy person, well you're not gonna stock your pantry with processed foods. Maybe you have more, you know, fruits and vegetables. Or maybe you're gonna make an attempt to, Oh, I can't go to the gym today, but you know, I'm gonna go walk around the block.

[00:17:11] And you're always gonna think that way. But, um, if you're setting a certain goal, again, if that helps you. I don't, I mean, I don't know. I'm one person. Some people wanna set goals and that helps them. So it may maybe is, I just think it as more of I want to keep creating apps, these small steps. Ironically, I have it, I think in my back.

[00:17:29] Yeah, I found that at, uh, whatever you say, my back for people listening, again, it's on my, uh, back wall, but like small steps every day, just incremental steps. Stay consistent. Keep having. Toward your direction. That's important for you. And I think you're gonna have a happy life that way. Every day's not gonna be perfect.

[00:17:46] Every day's not gonna be great. You're gonna miss days, you're gonna have, you know, setbacks. But you know, again, keep pushing forward, you know?

[00:17:53] Jeremy: The thing about that too, with those, with just those tiny, tiny steps that you add up every day in the, in the thick of it, when you're in the process, it feels like this is doing nothing. This is getting me nowhere. What a waste of time This is a fit. It's really easy to get discouraged by that sometimes.

[00:18:10] but that's where I think it's really important to sort of, uh, keep track of those things and to be able to then look back after a month, six months, whatever, and go, Oh man, I, it didn't seem like I was doing much. But now with hindsight, you know, I can, I can look back and see how far I've come because of those tiny things.

[00:18:28] I, I just think that's something that, that's something I fail to do a lot, is I, you know, I can feel like a failure a bunch. I can feel like I haven't come far enough on whatever journey I'm. And I don't do a good, good enough job of tracking the little things I do every day. And so it's really easy to get dis discouraged and you know, Zach were here.

[00:18:43] We would talk about how he often will say, Well dude, look, you know, you say you ate like crap last night or whatever compared to five years ago. Would you say that you ate like crap last night? There's little things like that there where you sort of need that accountability, I think, from either yourself or sometimes a partner to show you that those little things do add up and that they do.

[00:19:00] help 

[00:19:02] Brian: Yeah. And, and again, I think having, this is one again with the whole just get started mission. I would be a fraud if I was just like, Oh, get started and do whatever. And I'm, if I'm sitting here doing nothing, you know, like I enjoy like, putting the podcast out, you know, I'm almost at 300. Um, I think you guys will be in the late two nineties or whatever, episode wise or something like that.

[00:19:23] You know, you're, I was did episode one almost five years ago. Like there were, I had to have the first one before I have 300, but like writing the children's book, blogging consistently, you know, a couple times a week, like all of this. It's all just because I believe that everything I put out and you, and I think you guys probably agree as well, cuz your story's right, you, you.

[00:19:44] You and Zach both have unique stories, especially from around the fitness and, and health and kind of your journey is I share exactly what I do, the struggles I go through, the, the frustrations. I go through the, the, the exciting moments. You know, when I hit a, a personal record at CrossFit or something like that, I share all of it because I, again, the reason I share it is the person that's just behind me.

[00:20:06] Listen, I'm not that far ahead of many people. Like, you know, I'm, I'm kind of in the grind every. Um, so like the person that's just behind me or a little behind me that wants to look up to me and say, Wow, Brian's written two children's books. Or He is done this or that. Or he has, Yeah, he is done a podcast for five years.

[00:20:22] Oh my gosh. To let them know you could do the same thing. I'm not anything special. I just decided to make a change in my life cuz I was so complacent. I was so just letting fear dictate what happened to me. and I was tired of it. And ultimately it just took a lot of just restless nights and frustrations and looking in that accountability mirror to finally say, You know what, pocket man, let's, let's do it.

[00:20:46] Let's, let's get started and let's, let's see what happens in life. And I'm the happiest I've ever been, I think, because I've made those decisions, you know.

[00:20:53] Jeremy: Take us through some of those decisions. What are some of the things that you've done that have gotten you to a point where you're a successful podcaster, an author like you're doing all these things, you weren't always there. Take us on that journey.

[00:21:05] Brian: Well, I think, you know, there's a lot of inflection points I can go back to. Um, I, Let's start with one of the, the ones I think about a lot is, you know, my son was born in 20. And my first children's book that launched in May of 2020. Now, I had some issues with, uh, or excuse me, May of 2021. I'm forgetting what you were in.

[00:21:25] Um,

[00:21:26] Jeremy: last few are kind of a blur. Am I.

[00:21:28] Brian: yeah, I wrote it in 20. I wrote most of it and I shelved it for like seven years because, so, you know, to take you back of the Bryan of 20 12, 20 13, like I had no confidence in myself.

[00:21:42] I didn't think that I was anything worthy. I didn't think I thought it was gonna be like, when I remember back conversations I had myself, it was like, you're gonna work a job. I don't know how much money I would make. Like I didn't have that in my head, but like, work a job, maybe work your way up and you know, hopefully you have a safe life and you're kind of good.

[00:22:00] And I thought that's what happiness was like. The fact that I wasn't on the street kind of thing. Like I'm grateful for guys having a job and you know, having a family and stuff. But I, I used to think like just I was very complacent. That's the word that's best describes it. But I was also fearful, I was scared to branch out and do anything that would make me.

[00:22:21] Like I was trying to be something bigger than maybe people I thought looked at me. You know, like, And by the way too, I changed careers. So I was a PJ professional. I used to teach golf for a living, and I had transitioned in basically 2012, really full time. I transitioned out of the golf industry, so I was known as the golf guy.

[00:22:41] Ask any friends or people that knew me. I was the golf guy. I could, I still today, I mean, I have friends that I give, you know, like give some lessons to, if we're out in the range and stuff. I mean, I still love the game, but it's interesting of having to change that, um, that mindset of like, I'm not the golf guy anymore and, and not putting myself in this label of like, this is who I am.

[00:23:01] Cause that's what we all think like that, right? I'm this guy, or I do that, or I'm whatever. And starting to kind of realize like there's a broader sense here, then going back to the North Star. those are the things that I kept doing over and over again, was like, Oh, I have this idea.

[00:23:15] I wanna do this. And all of a sudden people would go by and be like, Why did I do that?

[00:23:23] it just comes back to like, you know, shelving the book, not going forward with other business ideas or anything like that. Again, it was just fear and I, I doubted myself, but what started to happen and, and this I give credit to a lot of d I mean, I give.

[00:23:39] Brian: Like random, like credit. I remember watching, you know, Gary Vayner, Chuck, um, I remember 2011 I watched, uh, one of his, uh, actually I watched a lot of his keynotes, but when YouTube would just kind of going out there, he was on, and I remember I was like, Whoa, what, who is this guy? And like, I hearing him talk differently and, and think differently.

[00:23:57] And that made, that kind of opened me. Having my brother around me who, you know, had a, a web agency and I was doing some work with him and seeing how he was growing and I always looked up to him as my older brother. So kind of, you know, having some people like that in my life and being able to realize like, wait a minute, they're not any different than me.

[00:24:17] Why can't I do this? So it wasn't a, this isn't the whole thing of like the overnight success or anything like that. Like it wasn't just one day. I'm like, Screw it. Let's do. It was many, many months and years of beating myself up and saying, Why can't you do it? What are you scared of? And it's like, it was like small little things.

[00:24:35] I probably, there's probably hundreds I can't even remember, but just like small little wins to get me out there. But obviously the podcast was the catalyst moment. That was the first major, like I'm getting myself out here. And then once I started the podcast, that ex just opened up the Pandora's Box because I'm talking to all these people. they're creating the world that they wanna live in and they're doing all these things. So that kind of led me to, again, push forward with the book Luke's first round of golf, and then some of these other things like, you know, uh, my latest one that just came out earlier this year, The magically magnificent, mysterious Mind, you know.

[00:25:15] I have wrote that in a challenge I had in 2020. I wrote that book in 30 days, and then I illustrated it, you know? Um, so again, it all goes back to, I mean, I can share a million stories on different things, but it all goes back to having the curiosity to ask questions and basically be dumb, like be a beginner learner again.

[00:25:35] and then gaining knowledge that I thought I knew, you know, I don't know if you were like this, but like growing up, you know how we always think we know the an we like, I know that like we know everything and we really know like the surface level, minimal amount, but for some reason we think we know everything.

[00:25:50] Once I realized that I know almost nothing about almost everything, it allowed me and, and again it, I had to really, um, I had to really push the ego down and really become more humble. and be more grateful about what I had. And what it allowed me to do was really expose my mind to, Okay, what's out there are, are my beliefs the correct things or could they be wrong?

[00:26:17] And when I started to push on that and prod, I started to realize that I was wrong in a lot of the ways I thought the ideas I had from childhood really didn't hold off in my 30. And I had a almost like, you know, reshape, um, who Bryan was. I, I jokingly call it my Renaissance period. Like I have, you know, I was like doing all this digging and discovery.

[00:26:37] Um, but yeah, that's, it's curiosity and it's really, you know, pushing the envelope on being a beginner learner and being okay with failing. I think that's maybe the, the greatest lesson I learned in all this is like the worst that could happen. So I fail, so I get laughed at. So what. Who cares? What's the alternative?

[00:26:59] Be complacent in, in a very comfortable spot where I'm not growing. I don't want that anymore.

[00:27:04] Jeremy: Let's talk about comfort, cuz that's definitely one of the things that we talk about all the time too, is that, you know, when you're on one of these self-development, self-improvement, spiritual, whatever, your journey, I have discovered on, in my, in my work that the more uncomfortable something seems, the more, you know, sort of threatening to my beliefs and my comfort zone, the more I'm gonna get out of it and the farther I'm gonna, you know, launch forward on this path.

[00:27:29] So how do you deal with this comfort? Is it, is it a, do you lean into it? Is the obstacle really the way, as Ryan Holiday likes to.

[00:27:36] Brian: Yeah, and it's, it's actually funny you mention that cuz he's one of my favorite authors. And um, and reading is actually one of the things that exposed me to a lot of. Um, but yeah, I think I've now leaned into it. I'm not saying I always did, As I mentioned earlier, I was scared to lean into any discomfort.

[00:27:55] But what I, what I actually realized was that from, to getting from uncomfortable or you know, like, or excuse me, our comfortable spot to like what's seems uncomfortable or discomfort. And then getting to where we're more comfortable with that. It's a sliver. It's not that big of a jump. We think it's like a, you know, grand Canyon size in terms of all the, but we are really experiencing little discomfort.

[00:28:19] And once you do that over and over, you know, as I look at kind of the stream of consciousness here, I think a lot of it, you know, being, um, in a sales professional role and uh, and software sales and stuff like that over the years, I think that's helped me. And, and having, you know, conversations that are always, um, can be difficult, right?

[00:28:39] It can be difficult. We can, we can press on folks and, you know, trying to get them to solve problems. So I think there's, there was, uh, some help kind of with that role and, and those roles that I've had. But I think ultimately, yeah, that discomfort was something I pushed away from in the past. And now I kind of embrace it.

[00:28:58] I'm like, Ooh, what could happen if I actually do this? But it, but I think it goes back to again, all the way, what I mentioned in the beginning is discovering what makes us happy. So if we understand that, hey, we're gonna have discomfort, like we already hit that he out, there's gonna be discomfort. Let's, let's know there's gonna be obstacles.

[00:29:16] Well, now that I'm ready for them, because I already know they're gonna come. But if it's something in my way to lead me toward happiness, well then let's go ahead and, and try it because I know if I can get over that barrier, I'm on my. You know, so I think it, it's, it goes back to as cliche as it sound, it's like, it's just mindset.

[00:29:34] It's thinking differently. It's being open to being wrong, like you said, and then, okay, we're wrong. Maybe, maybe we're right, Maybe we confirm things, but then what do we do with that? Right. Are we reshaping, or again, are we kind of battling like, well, yeah, maybe, but, you know, whatever, we're not gonna do anything about it.

[00:29:53] Cause I think that's, that's what happened. I don't know if you did. In your journey, but like for me, it was a lot of, I was wrong, but I would never seek the right answer. You know? I'd be

[00:30:03] Jeremy: I think, I think alternatively, I think alternatively you can, you can find out, and, and I've seen this a lot from people who, uh, newly discover or talk about Gary V is this idea. You realize you're wrong, but you don't know how to be right. There's so, there's such a flood of information. Like if you decide that's it, I'm purging my, my social media, I'm only gonna follow, you know, the people that are, are self development gurus that are, you know, spiritual leaders, all these things.

[00:30:32] If you start following that, you can get inundated with just hundreds of different points of view and, you know, You've been, uh, you've done the work to discover your North star, you know the thing that's driving you, but before you know that there's sort of this murky place where you're like, I'm not really sure.

[00:30:49] All I know is that I was wrong and now there's lots of ideas about how to be right, uh, or maybe not even how to be right, but, but how to find that North star. So how do you, what advice do you have for people that are sort of in that murky, I don't know yet, and there's a lot of different advice and I don't know which way to go.

[00:31:07] How do you

[00:31:07] Brian: Well, the, Yeah, there's a, there's a couple, I guess, angles to start. So first is, I always like to go back to childhood. I think most of our, yeah, most probably is the best word to use because I think most of our self living beliefs are habits that we have today. Whatever age you're at, they were developed in childhood.

[00:31:27] So I would first encourage people, cause I, I did this exercise is to go back and figure out, like, so I'll give you, I'll give, I'll share a story, which is interesting. So I, you know, and I, I'm, I, I can say, I guess I'm close to my parents. I'm not nearly as close as most people are when I, you know, talk to people about their parents.

[00:31:45] But I spent a lot of time around my grandparents grow. And I learned a lot of lessons from them. I learned a lot of empathy and compassion and stuff from them. But one of the things I remember is, and, and I was a middle child, so just, I don't know any middle children listening in. Like I had all this, like, um, I wanted to give so much like love to people and I wanted to share.

[00:32:07] I was very emotional. Um, I'm still emotional, um, to this. But I never felt I could share that with my family. Like we didn't say we loved each other or anything like that. So I kind of had this like inside of me where I couldn't expose it. But what was interesting is people, like friends of mine and, and, and, uh, classmates and high school and stuff, I would remember, like, I, I actually remember like sitting in study hall, like senior year and stuff like that where people would come up to me and like, share.

[00:32:36] They're problems with me. Or let's say it's a boyfriend girlfriend and they talk about the relationship with me, and I'd just be sitting there and, and I'm like, I, I think back now, I never thought about it at that time, but I think back now and, and when I did this exercise was like, why did people come up to me?

[00:32:50] Well, I think I was comfortable to talk to, like I, I gave them a warm feeling that I was gonna be there and listen to them and offer maybe whatever advice I could share, but at least be like kind of open where other people might have shut them out. Um, and I've had other people say this over the years.

[00:33:06] So it's something I really looked at and, and again, it goes back to becoming a navigator and realizing that was like, I have so much empathy and compassion for people. I feel I'm very kind like those are things I never could share though when I was a kid, but have always been inside me. So I leaned into those as I started to look at what's my purpose in life and where do I wanna, you know, what do I want to do?

[00:33:25] What are, what are some things I could do to to shape the world? And I went back to empathy Compass. Gratitude, kindness, Like those things that are core, uh, to me. Um, so anyways, I would encourage people to go back and think about childhood, think about the things that you enjoy doing, but also think about the areas where you felt suffocated, where you felt you couldn't expose yourself.

[00:33:45] What, what does that look like? And that might at least give you a glimmer of hope of, wait a minute, these are things I should be doing, but I shouldn't. Right. It's kind of like, Telling kids not to, you know, whatever, Um, play with paint and paint something or whatever that is their kid. And, and you keep, well, all of a sudden they decide, they go be a lawyer and they're working, you know, 80 hours a week and they're whatever, but they love to paint, but they got suppressed as a kid.

[00:34:08] But let, let expose that. So I think there's a lot of things we can do as we look back at childhood. Um, that would be my first, I guess, encouragement, uh, for folks. As I just think it, uh, I just think it opens us up to things that we haven't maybe thought about in a long time. Um, and it might be painful too, you know, might be pain.

[00:34:25] Have you ever done that exercise? 

[00:34:27] Jeremy: I, I feel like I, I sort of do it in spurts all the time because this is, you know, we talked about how we're, we're both just a few steps ahead of whoever's behind us. And, and you know, coincidentally, today is one of those days where I, I don't feel like I'm a few steps ahead of anybody. So, you know, it's conversations like this that, that always helped me.

[00:34:42] Um, but I do, I, I try, I was having a conversation with a friend the other day about passion, and it's just, what, what are you passionate about? And we both kind of were. I, I don't know if I know yet. You know, I'm still sort of figuring it out. And, you know, this, just to be honest, this show started as a, as a passion project.

[00:34:59] And it, and it has served at times as an accountability tool, as an educational tool, uh, just for myself, right? A lot of times when I'm sitting here talking into the microphone, I'm talking to myself to try and motivate myself to get over whatever hump I'm, I'm in right now. But, you know, uh, you know, I think in, in a lot of ways other than. Trying to help other people feel less lonely than I have felt at the darkest points of my life. Like that's sort of my North Star. That's the thing that keeps driving me, is that I don't want anyone else to feel the way I do and have when I am just in the dark, lost feel like nobody else can feel the way that I do.

[00:35:43] And so, When that doesn't feel like enough, that's when I, I started thinking like, what did I do as a kid? What was fun? Where did I find joy? And to be honest, I didn't find a lot cuz I had, you know, there was alcoholism in the house, there was a lot of instability. I was home alone a lot as a latchkey kid, you know, as a Gen Xer.

[00:36:00] So it's tough to find that joy for me because I don't know that I've always had it. I feel like I've spent most of my life in survival mode. Um,

[00:36:09] Brian: But isn't that part of the pain that that's ac that pain though? I think like we, what you mentioned helped people feel less lonely because you had so much pain. This goes back to exactly why I want to help again navigate people to just get started because I had so much pain. From not starting and having these ideas sit in my head and it, it weighed me down.

[00:36:27] It's probably similar to you, is

[00:36:28] Jeremy: yeah.

[00:36:29] Brian: but, but one of the things, and, and I gotta give credit to Rich Keller, um, who's my mentor, and, and you know, again, he helped me discover my one word is that he always tells me to think bigger.

[00:36:38] Jeremy: Mm-hmm.

[00:36:39] Brian: He's like, Brian, just get started is not the podcast. Just get started is not your blog.

[00:36:44] Just get started is not, you know, whatever children's books just get started is your mission to help navigate people to just get started. You do that through the podcast, through the books right now, but if down the road I want to do something totally different, as long as it aligns with that and that's why that, that's the thing that, and maybe this is a good lesson for everyone listening cuz talking about passion.

[00:37:08] I always used to think it was a product. Like, Oh, I wanna do this. I'm passionate about this, I'm gonna build this. But what Rich got me to realize was, I, you have to think bigger and, and almost think when he thinks bigger, almost like think of like the umbrella, like what's the top? And then everything falls underneath.

[00:37:27] So it's not about a product because that can go away, but your mission goes away. So that's why. So I like how you're, you, you, you mention about, you know, helping people feel less lonely. Well, you can do that in a lot of, Right. It could be through the podcast, it could be whatever. Um, and that may be a good place to start.

[00:37:43] So, yeah, I think looking back at childhood, I mean, I don't have the, all the answers. I mean, I, I, I think it's just, I, I think it's really just looking back at, you know, we talked about this before, but like, just sitting in thought and accepting what you wanna do. We know, I think we have all the answers ourselves.

[00:38:03] I think we, I think we know what we want to do. Really. It's, are we willing to accept what we want to do and go do it. So let's use the example of the artist. I'm gonna, I'm gonna use this as an example here. Hopefully it's helpful. Let's say we always wanted to be an artist, but we're working a nine to five job, doing whatever.

[00:38:23] It doesn't really matter what it is. Insert. So if we know we wanna be an artist, if that's kind of, Oh, that's the thing that's really driving us. No one is saying to quit your job tomorrow and become a full-time artist. But the encouragement is, well, if you wanna be an artist, if that's what you love to do right now, and again, maybe that changes or whatever, but for right now, you wanna try it.

[00:38:47] Jeremy: Yeah.

[00:38:48] Brian: Well then what are you doing in those hours outside of the nine to. What are you doing? And when you consume content online, right? What are the people that you're hanging around? Are those driving forward? You might not hang around artists, but are you hanging around people that are supportive of your ideas that you could talk with and learn from?

[00:39:07] And that's one thing I learned throughout this whole journey was that if I get around the right people, that are supportive, that I can learn from and vice versa. Right? There's a mutual thing they can learn from me if they'd like.

[00:39:19] Um, but if I'm always trying to seek out information that's gonna help lead me down my path. So I'll, I'll 49ers, I'll do other stuff. It's not like I'm a robot and only doing everything, you know, related to the just get started mission, but, I, I have to focus and prioritize things to go down that line. And a lot of that, you know, I, again, full transparency, I work full time in software sales still, and all the other stuff I'm doing is outside of that.

[00:39:47] But I find time to prioritize that when I have the availability, because I think it's valuable to me. I'm, I look at it from delayed gratification. I don't need the short term win right now. I'm looking at it as, as I go on in life and, you know, hopefully I live a longer life that I'm. I'm gonna set myself up in the next three, five years, whatever, to have the freedom and autonomy that I want, um, that I didn't have in prior years.

[00:40:14] So that's how I look at it. And again, someone else may, you know, look at their, you know, quote unquote happiness as something different, and that's fine. But again, that's where sitting with yourself and figuring out what you want. Because if you want freedom and you want to be able to say, Hey, I wanna be able to do what I want when I please, well, then again, I always go to this analogy, but like, do you need the big house?

[00:40:35] Do you need the, the luxury car? Do you need all these things that it makes you look cool, maybe by your neighbors, but is it weighing you down from actually getting, digging outta debt, let's say? Or again, get moving to a new area or whatever, or again, starting your art business. So it all intertwines together.

[00:40:54] But we, if we don't know where the starting line is, if we don't actually know where we want to begin, well then how do we know if we're making the right.

[00:41:02] Jeremy: And, and I will say that some of those sort of tangible things that, that fall under that umbrella, if you don't have that umbrella, there are, there are, there have been, I don't even know how many days where I've got time. I'm by myself and I can do whatever it, whatever I want. That thing that I, that I want the, the free time to do.

[00:41:21] And you just, you find yourself staring into a void of, I don't even know what that is. What am I working toward? So if you haven't done sort of the work to figure out where am I going, that when those doors swing wide open and you've suddenly got a five hour block of time to push toward whatever that thing is, and you don't know, that's a big, big void to stare at.

[00:41:42] Brian: And it doesn't mean as well. I, I, I think we can always pivot and change. This is, this goes back to what we were talking about earlier. It's okay to be wrong. It's okay to say, Gosh, you know what, Maybe this is not what I, My purpose was maybe it was for a few years, but at least you're creating the life that you want.

[00:41:58] Versus the other way around, letting other people dictate what you do. This is one thing I teach my son this, um, he's, you know, he's had some difficulty at school going into fifth grade and, you know, I, I try to teach him that he has the choice. It is purely his choice. So if he doesn't have a good day at school, he has no one else to blame but himself.

[00:42:17] Now he's had some, as we're recording this, he's had some good days recently because he's, and his teachers even told me, like, he's kind of said that to her. So maybe he's actually listen his pop, the, you know, his dad here. Um, but like I, I try to ingrain him like, Dude, you have the choice to make the difference in how your behavior is.

[00:42:35] Like no one else. And that comes back to accountability. You know, this goes back, this could be fitness, this can be anything. I mean, we could talk for hours about any type of, um, angle to this. It's accountability. That's all it is. And if you have a hard time becoming accountable, who, who's gonna be able to change that?

[00:42:52] But yourself,

[00:42:53] Jeremy: Yep.

[00:42:53] Brian: You gotta figure out why. That, that might be one of the first steps everyone listen in. Like, how, where do I start? Well, the first step might be why can you, why are you not holding yourself account?

[00:43:02] Jeremy: Yeah.

[00:43:03] Brian: That might be a first step to dig into where is that coming from? Maybe it comes back from childhood, maybe that's, who knows,

[00:43:08] Jeremy: Exactly.

[00:43:09] Brian: So there's a lot of roundabout ways, but like I said, I, I, I feel we have to sit with ourselves and, and be quiet and let ourselves process the thoughts and then just accept what we come up with.

[00:43:20] Because I think we do have the answer. Sometimes we're unwilling to accept what that answer is because it doesn't look good to the outside.

[00:43:27] Jeremy: I think you jumped ahead in my notes cuz I was just gonna ask you, uh, as we wrap things up here, what, uh, what is maybe one or two things that you would tell somebody who. Sitting on that idea, kicking around that thing that's been rolling around in their head, that they sitting on the shelf, whatever. How do they just get started?

[00:43:43] Brian: Well, I mean the reality is almost any, I mean, I'll say this cuz I, and I believe this is absolutely. Almost anyone you look at. So said, listen or listen again, right? Anyone you look at, um, and you look up to, they almost have no idea what they're doing. They're making it up just like we are. They may have some idea, maybe they may have, Okay, I kind of want to go down this path or whatever, but they don't have all the steps in place.

[00:44:13] They may have a goal a year out, but they don't know how they're gonna get to that goal yet. They might be still ideating, so that should give everyone confidence that whatever they're thinking in their head, what, what's the big deal? If they start like, let's, let's use an idea, like if they wanna write a book, right?

[00:44:27] Someone wants to write. What's the harm in mapping out the book of just like, okay, what's the topic gonna be about? Let me jot some notes down. What's the harm in doing that today? And then if you do that today, what's the harm in doing some more note taking tomorrow? And maybe what's the harm the next day of, you know, writing 200 words and, and you start going down this and you're like, I don't know what it's gonna become.

[00:44:51] But all I have to do is dedicate a little time and energy, and I can't tell you what that time is. Is that 30 minutes? Is that an hour? Is that four hours? You know, who knows, right? Everyone's different. But I, this whole and one of the things too, I, I used to think that, Oh, this idea I have, Oh, it was such a great idea.

[00:45:09] I'm not gonna do it. Like, okay, let's keep this hidden. Let's do whatever. No, I the talk about it. Do, you know, bring it out to light, write it down, expose it. and start moving forward with it. I mean, yeah. The, the whole, Yeah, just get started. It's like easier said than done sometimes. It's like, but it really is like, what are, what's the incremental thing?

[00:45:29] Like if you had 10 minutes today on whatever idea it is, what is the simplest path forward? You know, it's like David Goggins. You file David Goggins.

[00:45:37] Jeremy: I, Yeah, I do.

[00:45:38] Brian: Yeah. You like Goggins. So, you know, and by the way, I recommend his book Can't Hurt Me, is just an unbelievable story. I love his book, I recommend the audio book, but like his thing is, Forget about a hard workout.

[00:45:50] You, you, you today might just be putting on the shoes. You know, that that might be the first step, just putting on the shoes, getting ready to start, and then maybe tomorrow it's walking out the door. Like that's how simple we have to think about it. If we're having a hard time starting, everything else works in if, if we're consistent with it, if we do the small steps, the things we've talked about, we don't know what it's gonna become. And by the way, we may figure out like, how, how many episodes are you now? 140 ish,

[00:46:19] Jeremy: Uh, we're in that range.

[00:46:21] Brian: Yeah. So same, like I said, when I, when I start episode one, I didn't know I would get to 300 episodes. I may get to 600 or 900 or 5,000 someday. I have no idea. But it's the idea of like, Hey, I'm gonna put the next one out.

[00:46:34] I'm gonna, and by the way, I was gonna stop the podcast three or four different times, but what kept me going was, again, similar. Maybe you're you, you're saying today, like you almost feel. You know, you're behind. Like I had those times too where I'm like, this isn't, I'm not, I don't have as many listeners as I thought, or why is the, And I kept going back to, I don't give a shit about that.

[00:46:54] It's not about having as many listeners as Joe Rogan. It's about is there one listener that's gonna get impacted by this episode that was similar to me. And that's what keeps me driving. That's what keeps me going, and that's what I encourage everyone. What is your idea? How is it one gonna make you happy just by doing it?

[00:47:14] And then two, does it, Can you share that with the world and is that gonna make it exponentially better? Because now you're sharing that greatness of the idea with everyone else, like the cool thing.

[00:47:24] Jeremy: And, and I would argue, I would argue sometimes even just sometimes it has to just be about the work. Even if nobody ever hears a, here's a, you know, the work sees it. What I like just, it has to be about just getting that out of you in some way to, to be able to move

[00:47:40] Brian: Yeah, because we're talking, you know, a lot of the times you'll talk in like a business sense, like, hey, we start a business or whatever, but some people just want, maybe it's a garden you've been wanting to do in your backyard. Well, again, what's the first step? I don't, I don't know. Maybe it's reading about gardening.

[00:47:53] Maybe it's going to Home Depot. Like I, I don't know, But like, go and start doing it. Maybe it's getting one small, um, seed. From the apple you just ate. And I, I dunno if you ever grow an apple tree, but you know what I'm saying, Get the idea. But like, and, and, and I'm, I'm gonna go ahead and I'm gonna just gonna put this in a small pot and just start the, like, it could be the smallest thing, but just go do.

[00:48:14] And what I know will absolutely happen is you will feel fulfilled and you'll be excited to do it even more, but you gotta get yourself out of the gate to even try it. There's nothing bad that can happen because of it.

[00:48:29] Jeremy: I tell, I tell my kids all the time, The only things you're gonna regret are the things you decided not to try.

[00:48:34] Brian: Yeah, absolutely. Cause we can try it and it may not, it may not work, but at least we know we tried and we learned from it for the next endeavor.

[00:48:40] Jeremy: Exactly. I've kept you much, much longer than, uh, than we

[00:48:44] Brian: Sorry, I've got a

[00:48:45] Jeremy: No, I I, I feel bad. I should be the one driving the bus. I let it go way off to the left. Sorry about that. So thank you for your, for your time. Tell us more about where we can learn, uh, more about you, your show, your books, and all the things you do online.

[00:48:57] Brian: Yeah, I mean, everything's on my, uh, and I appreciate it, Jeremy, having me on here. Um, Brian on draco.com, b r i a n o n d r ako.com is my website that has kind of links to everything. I'm on all the socials at Brian on Draco. Um, so folks can connect with me there and yeah, just get started. Podcast is. You know, kind of my baby that I started almost five years ago, so I love doing that.

[00:49:18] Have the blog you can subscribe to, so bunch of different stuff. Check out the children's books if you have kids under 10. Um, there's some cool books out there too, so

[00:49:26] Jeremy: All great stuff and we'll have the links to all of that in the show notes for this episode at our website. Brian, thanks so much for your time again today, man. I really, really appreciate the conversation

[00:49:35] Brian: yeah. Thanks Jeremy.

[00:49:36] Zach: Thanks to Brian and Draco from the Just Get Started podcast. You can find links to him and his work in the show notes for this episode@thefitmess.com. 

[00:49:44] Jeremy: Yeah, and I really liked when he talked about really the, the core of everything that he believes and teaches is finding your North star, and particularly finding one, finding that goal that you know, in your lifetime you will never reach because it's not about reaching that goal, it's about just keeping the compass pointed in the right direction.

[00:50:00] To make sure that the decisions you're making and the things that you're doing keep you 

[00:50:03] on that TA on that path so that you can really, 

[00:50:06] like we talk about all the time, sort of become that person that you're trying to. 

[00:50:10] Zach: Yeah. I know for me it's, you know, just being pointed in that direction is really important. You're gonna take a lot of turns and it's not gonna be a straight line and it's gonna be really squiggly, but it helps keep the direction and the focus in the right place. So, totally agree with. 

[00:50:24] Jeremy: Yeah. when you're lost, you just point it back in that direction and you'll find it. 

[00:50:29] Zach: Hmm. I spend most of my time lost. 

[00:50:33] Jeremy: I've definitely spent the last several weeks lost, but, uh, I, I think I'm starting to see a shining light 

[00:50:37] that's getting me back on track. Uh, but part I think, you know, and honestly part of what has been making me lost some of the things that have been keeping me 

[00:50:45] off the path have been the limiting beliefs, the things that 

[00:50:48] I've believed about myself since I was a kid. And, and really, I mean, we've talked about this a bunch lately, just the, the sort of recent. Acknowledgement that a lot of the voices in my head are not even my own. And they were, they were planted there by the things that other people said either to me or about themselves. And, you know, I'm, I'm just now learning 

[00:51:06] how to sort of ignore those voices and, and recognize that they're, they're not me and they don't identify me and, and should not continue to prevent me from living the life, uh, or at least living a life of intention rather than just sort of going along, doing what, you know, I, I think I'm supposed to be.

[00:51:22] Zach: And this is the point that I bring up all the time about being curious about yourself and asking yourself, What if I'm wrong? What if this is wrong? Right. It, it, it's mind blowing how many things that I have uncovered that I believed for years and years and years, and then went, Huh, that's kind of bullshit. It just changes your whole perspective on everything. 

[00:51:44] Jeremy: Which can create a 

[00:51:46] level of discomfort, and I think that's where you know you're on the right track. When you know that you're getting uncomfortable, you can lean into those obstacles and 

[00:51:53] figure out that those are the things that are really preventing you from 

[00:51:56] feeling happier, feeling more joy in your life.

[00:51:58] And so really lean into them. The obstacle truly 

[00:52:01] is the way. Bust through those myths, bust, bust, 

[00:52:04] through those limiting beliefs and really start 

[00:52:06] to find better ways to live your life. To feel a little bit 

[00:52:08] happi.

[00:52:10] Zach: Yeah, and, and on the way though, like we stress this all the time. , um, a support system, coaches, people can help you. The we, we talk about vulnerability and when you are vulnerable, the people who need to be there to help you through those situations will show up and, help you. So go find a coach, find a support system, and and just make sure they know what your North Star is and they'll help you get there too. 

[00:52:34] Jeremy: and perhaps you'll find them in our Facebook group. 

[00:52:37] There are a ton of people in there that are on a similar journey and we try to offer, 

[00:52:40] you know, various accountability tools and, and challenges and, ways to really keep you on track toward that North 

[00:52:46] Star. And so we hope you'll join us there. You can find the link to 

[00:52:48] that on our website.

[00:52:49] It's the fit mess.com. That's where we will be back next 

[00:52:52] week with a brand new episode. Thanks for listen. 

[00:52:55] Zach: See it wrong.

Brian Ondrako Profile Photo

Brian Ondrako

Navigating People To Just Get Started

Brian Ondrako is guided by his One Word as a Navigator and his "North Star" is to Navigate people to Just Get Started.

He believes that in order to discover happiness we must be willing to discover ourselves first.

Brian is an Author, Writer, Sales Consultant, Podcast Host, and most importantly a Single Dad to an amazing young boy.