May 3, 2022

How To Find Balance In Your Life To Achieve Better Health And More Happiness With Meghan Pherrill

How To Find Balance In Your Life To Achieve Better Health And More Happiness With Meghan Pherrill

Our guest is Meghan Pherrill-Gordon, creator of Balance by Meghan.


Meghan Pherrill-Gordon suffered for a long time with depression, anxiety, OCD, and suicidal thoughts. One day she decided enough was enough and she wanted more out of life, so she started to work on herself internally, loving herself more, and taking up yoga. 

After noticing the miraculous changes she made in her life, she knew she had to share her gift with others. She supports her clients by empowering and teaching them to connect to their mind, body and soul. She does this by teaching them how to care for and nourish their bodies, how to calm their mind and manage their thoughts, and how to invite more wellness into their lives as a form of self-care and self-love. 

She also shares her inspiring story and supports your yoga, spirituality, health, and wellness journey on her own podcast, Balance Your Life!

What We Discuss with Meghan:

  • How yoga helped her overcome many of her mental health challenges
  • Why it’s not true that you “can’t meditate”
  • What is Human Design? 
  • Why sometimes it’s important to combine holistic practices with western medicine
  • Self-development tools that DON’T work

Find accountability and support with The Fit Mess Facebook Community. Join an intimate group taking their well-being to the next level today, by CLICKING HERE.

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Guest Website

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[00:00:00] Zach: Something about your life seems I dunno off, you're not sure what to make of it, but you know, something needs to change a lack of balance in your life, physically, mentally, and spiritually. It can cause depression and anxiety along with a lot of other health products.

[00:00:16] Jeremy: But I guess this week says no matter why we're out of balance, we can fix it. We'll talk with Megan Farrell. Hosted the balancer life podcast about small steps, habit changes, and mindset shifts she made to help her manage mental and physical health and how they can help you find your way back to a life of balance. 

[00:00:34] This is the fit mess conversations with world-class experts in the fields of mental, physical, and emotional health. And this episode 

[00:00:43] Megan Pherrill: I think everybody has to hit their version of rock bottom and it doesn't necessarily have to be so drastic. Like mine. It can literally be like, 

[00:00:51] Megan: I'm just tired of Hating looking in the mirror and seeing myself it's like, that could be your rock bottom, your rock bottom can be like, 

[00:01:00] Megan Pherrill: I'm just tired of feeling tired all the time.

[00:01:02] And maybe if I eat a little healthier, it'll give me the energy. I think it just, it really, really does come down to a decision and a commitment.

[00:01:11] Now, here are your hosts, Zach and Jeremy. 

[00:01:14] Zach: Welcome to the fitness brought to you by athletic greens. Thanks for listening while you're doing whatever it is that you're doing right now. I'm Zach and he's Jeremy. We've been through all kinds of struggles and we ended up stronger because of them.

[00:01:25] And we want to help you do the same. So if you're sick of your own shit and you're ready to make a serious change, you're in the right.

[00:01:32] Jeremy: Zach I'm going to do something. I don't know if we've ever done on this show. I'm going to start this week with an email that we actually got from a listener, uh, that I think 

[00:01:38] Zach: It's a good email, right? 

[00:01:40] Jeremy: uh, I hope so. 

[00:01:41] Zach: Okay.

[00:01:43] Jeremy: , but, but we got an email from this listener, , that I think really puts this week's topic into perspective. A new listener named Ty wrote to us, and he said I've been on my health and fitness journey for about a year. But I've been actually taking it seriously since right after Thanksgiving of last year, prior to this, my life was going okay in terms of my career, my family, but I really was not taking care of myself and was headed down a dark path of poor health habits, eating junk, drinking almost daily, but after realizing that this has really led to less than ideal relationships with my wife and kids, I decided I needed to change. See he's sick of his own shit. So after my usual Thanksgiving binge last year, I decided to take my health more seriously by working out every day, eating healthier and listening to more health, fitness, and wellness podcasts, like the 40 plus fitness podcast, where I recently discovered your fit mass podcast. One of the biggest things I've gotten from your podcast is the idea of looking at health and fitness as a journey while focusing less on my desired outcomes.

[00:02:37] So as I continue on my journey, I have already seen things improve in terms of my happiness relationships with my family and my ability to actually be more involved with my kids. Again, that's from Ty. I just think that's awesome. I think that that is exactly what we're trying to help people with here is this idea.

[00:02:53] I don't think there's ever like a, an ongoing balance. You're on a Seesaw. Sometimes things are up sometimes they're down and, and being able to ride that wave without worrying about how was this ride going to end is the key. Like, if you, if you can just enjoy the downs or at least tolerate them until you're back on the ups, that's when you can start to find more peace in all areas of your life. 

[00:03:16] Zach: Yeah, I absolutely love this because I know for me, when I have a goal in mind, if I want to weigh this, or I want to look a certain way, I focus on that end result. And whenever I'm not there, I'm unhappy with it as opposed to focusing on the way there, which, , if I wanted to lose 30 pounds and I've only lost two, I can't celebrate that because I haven't lost 30.

[00:03:41] But I need to focus on celebrating the two or focus on the four, the six, the way on the way to it. So I absolutely love this myself too.

[00:03:50] Jeremy: And also how many times is, is reaching the goal empty or, or shockingly temporary, like you get there? Yes, I did it. That's awesome. You know, raise a glass of non-alcoholic beer to me. That's great. Okay. What's. 

[00:04:04] That goal took you a year to get to a year of lessons of struggle of life that you didn't, you didn't sit with, that you weren't with, that you didn't really absorb because you were so focused on the 10 minutes you were going to feel awesome on that one day. 

[00:04:19] Zach: Nope. I was talking to a guy the other day who is training for a 5k and I was like, oh, well, that's cool. And he's like, yeah, I know 5k 10. Half marathon marathon. And I was like, oh, what, why are you planning for all that? And he's like, well, usually what happens is, is I pick a goal, I get to it. And then I lose everything because I don't have anything to follow it up with.

[00:04:42] And he's like, and I'm kind of changing my mindset to be, , this big, long journey with multiple goals along the way. 

[00:04:49] Jeremy: Yup. Yup. 

[00:04:50] Zach: It was really great.

[00:04:51] Jeremy: I, I, I still haven't gotten good at sort of measuring the goals or, or measuring the small steps along the way. I'll have the big idea. I was complaining to you the other day, about how, , I've been working out every day now for like four months. And, you know, I'm not seeing the physical change in the mirror that I want to see as much as I would like to.

[00:05:10] And I'm so triggered by that and like, ah, this is like, why am I putting all this time? Every of this is really hard and I'm forgetting that like the amount of weight that I'm lifting every day, Goes up every day that the strength that I have is better when I'm out for hikes, I'm able to jump further across streams and, and do these things that I, before I would have just not done.

[00:05:31] And so I'm trying to really focus when I see those tiny, incremental things that are, that are improving because otherwise I look in the mirror and I go, fuck it. Why, why, what am I doing this for? And then you just give up and that's, that's the dangerous cycle that people fall into is wanting to start the.

[00:05:47] And a week later be there hit the goal, be done. Look awesome. And when you don't, it's just so easy to quit. 

[00:05:54] Zach: Yeah. It's like we talked about last time with the superheroes, right? They just are superheroes and, you know, think about all the work they had to put into becoming the superhero. I was at the gym, I dunno, a couple months ago, like shortly after I hurt my shoulder and, , lifting weights over my head.

[00:06:11] Just remember having this moment where I went to put something up and it, it hurt too much. I had to drop it and I couldn't do it. And I had to, , use a lower weight and my mind started going down this road of like, you suck, you're pathetic. Like, why are you even here? This is ridiculous.

[00:06:31] Your shoulders hurt. Why are you even trying to do this? And it just kind of clicked with me and it was great to like have this, this realization or like, you know, only took 25 years of practicing, shifting my mindset for it to shift automatically of, if you keep going down this road, your whole day is going to be shitty because of this one moment.

[00:06:53] And I would have been an asshole to my kid. I would've been an asshole to my family. People at work, like it just would've gone all over the place. And then I took a second and looked at it and I was like, okay, even though I didn't make that lift, I lifted more than I did last week. so it's just so important to really make sure you're focusing on the journey and be mindful of the goal, but not focused so much on the goal that you lose yourself in the journey.

[00:07:21] Jeremy: Yeah. It's like the focus of this entire episode. It's all about balance. And one way I try to stay balanced is with my nutrition. That's why I started taking athletic. '

[00:07:31] I started taking athletic greens because Zach told me to, for months, he shared why it was so helpful for him while I was swallowing three fistfuls of vitamins, three times a day.

[00:07:40] I have to tell you, I noticed a difference on day one. I felt better and didn't have that 4:00 PM energy crash that I thought was normal.

[00:07:46] Now I've been on it for several weeks and I love it. It's packed with 75 high quality vitamins minerals, whole food sourced, superfoods, and. And it works with any diet plan and it tastes great for less than three bucks a day. You're investing in your health for a lot less than your cabinet, full of vitamins or your daily coffee habit.

[00:08:04] So reclaim your health and arm your immune system. Now with convenient daily nutrition 

[00:08:08] To make it easy. Athletic greens is going to give you a free one-year supply of immune supporting vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. Those are so. All you have to do is visit athletic forward slash fit mess again, that is athletic forward slash fitness. To take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance.

[00:08:28] You'll also find that link on our website, the 

[00:08:32] Zach: So in talking about all these goals and the journey and everything like that, , it's really important to have balance in your life and making sure that you're taking care of things appropriately. Our guest today knows a little something about that. Her name is Megan feral. She's the host of the balance, your life podcast. we started off by just asking her where her story started.

[00:08:50] Megan: My story does start when I was really, really young. I was diagnosed with severe asthma, right from the get-go, like from a baby.

[00:08:59] And then I was diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder when I was about eight years old, I was very, very anxious just as a child. And then the OCD really, really kicked it up a notch. I was put on antianxiety medication and antidepressants at that time, and I really, really struggled with OCD.

[00:09:24] So obsessive compulsive disorder is this need to control your environment and to do things in a ritual or a routine. And it differs for anyone who does have it. But for me, it was more if I didn't do these things in a specific sequence or in a certain amount of. Times, for example, coat counting all the books on my bookcase 40 times, like that's insane for anybody to do.

[00:09:49] And I was, you know, 8, 9, 10 years old struggling with this. And if I didn't do it, I had a huge fear that something was going to happen to me or my parents were going to die. Like it was very, very, very extreme. So on top of that, when I was about 12 years old, I was then sexually assaulted by a family member and that just exasperated everything. It kicked my OCD up so much. It kicked my anxiety up and I was suicidal. I was very, very depressed. Like I wouldn't leave my house because I was so afraid of not being able to control anything that happened outside of my house. So this went on for, oh God, like longer than I care to admit I struggled all throughout high school. I was a self cutter. And at the time I was about 15 years or so, and all of this had happened and. My mom thought if I had tried yoga, perhaps it could help me calm down a little bit. And at the very least she thought it would at least help with my asthma attacks because of my OCD and my anxiety. Like I could trigger an asthma. Like through anything, like my allergies were insane. just if I was super anxious, I would go into a full-blown asthma attack. I was always in the hospital. I gotten to the point where the doctors were like, we literally cannot put you on steroids anymore because it's becoming so dangerous for you to be on this as much as you are. So my mom's like at the very least, you know, maybe it'll help with your brain. And I did a couple of yoga classes. I was in like an unfinished basement of my mom's friend's house. There was clutter everywhere. Like I was the youngest by far, there was maybe six of us and, you know, they were doing it because of like at the time it was like menopause and maybe it'll help with our hot flashes.

[00:11:51] And I just did not resonate with. Literally at all. I was like, this is stupid. I'm not gaining anything from it. And you want to help with my breathing. I can't even breathe through my nose. Like this is not working at all for me. So cut to, I was like just really, really struggling with life in general. And I got to a point of. It's hard to explain, but I literally got to a point where it was like, I'm either going to take my life because this sucks so much. And I absolutely do not want to do it anymore. Or something has got to give. And I was in grade 12, people were going off to college and university at the time I had a boyfriend, which I don't even know how it had happened, but he had broken up with me and I was just. F this, this has got a stop and it was literally like a light switch that I made the decision that I was going to change my life. And I stopped about 60% of my OCD tendencies. Literally overnight. I actually went into a study later on because it's very rare for somebody to kick an OCD habit and doctors and psychologists were just like floored, how I had managed to. Stop it literally overnight, it was about two or three years later where I literally kicked every single habit that I had associated with my OCD, but I was still on meds at this point. And I'm not on them anymore, but at the time I really was grateful for them because, because I was feeling very suicidal. Anyone who's been on these medications? No, for me, at least it didn't. Necessarily make me happy. Like I wasn't a happier person, but I wasn't feeling so suicidal anymore. Like I was just kind of coasting by. I ended up meeting my now husband. And he had been on the same meds as me. And he was like, Megan, you can do this.

[00:13:56] Like, we can all be there with you. I'll help you out with this, but I know you can come off this medication. And it was like a really chaotic time in my life. My grandpa had just passed away and I was really close with him. somehow between the chaos of him passing, I had forgotten to renew my prescription for my meds. And I had realized like two days had gone by and I hadn't taken them. And my husband boyfriend at the time was like, this is great. It's two days, like, let's just keep going. I would never suggest this to somebody. 

[00:14:31] Like my doctor was so pissed off at me for doing this like cold Turkey and I was on a high dose. But every day was like, okay, it's been three days without the meds. Like I can keep doing this. And I went through withdrawal systems. It was really hard, but I started to notice, okay, like I'm feeling better about myself. And the biggest thing was I wasn't mapping anymore. Like those meds made me so tired that. I had all this like free time now. And I was like, why don't I want to do with this free time? Usually I'd be napping for two hours at this point. Like what is there to do? And this little voice in my head was like, try yoga, like yoga. All right. But I enrolled like a crappy math that I had from Walmart and in my head, I was like, well, if I'm going to do yoga, I want it to be more of a workout.

[00:15:23] So I'm going to do power yoga. I did like a 20 minute video online. I've always been a smaller person, but I've never been in shape. And this video kicked my butt and I committed right there. I was like, I'm doing this three times a week until I can master this video. And then we'll just see what happens after that. So three days became four days. You know, I mastered the video. I moved on to a couple of others. Four days became five days, and then I was doing it every single day of the week. And it started off, which is 20 minutes here, usually after school. And I would notice changes in my physical body. I was like, oh my God, like, I'm getting a little stronger.

[00:16:03] I couldn't do a plank to save my life before and Hey, at least I'm holding it for like 10 breaths. Now this is really cool. And that became okay. Well, How do I like eat a little bit healthier so that I can keep this physical body that I'm starting to develop? Because I was very content with chicken fingers and fries, and my idea of vegetable.

[00:16:24] I know, right. I couldn't eat that now to save my life, but my idea of a vegetables like corn, and if you were lucky, I would eat some carrots, but it. You know, and my parents aren't amazing cooks they're decent cooks, but it was very much like a protein rice or potato and one vege. So I would start to eat like my vegetables first and then I would eat my protein and then it would be like, okay, if there was rice leftover and I'm still hungry, I would have a little bit of it. I've never been one for like pop or anything. So like, water was never an issue for me, but then I was eating a little bit better and I was like, oh, this is. Fascinating. I'm like my workouts are getting a little better. I'm eating a little better. And then my sleep started to improve and it just became this trifecta of what can I do every single day that moves the needle a little bit further. At this time I was completely off my medication. I still struggled a little bit with asthma. My parents also had pets, which was 

[00:17:28] like my number one allergy. And since moving out at their house, like I haven't had an asthma issue in six months now. So it, it literally like, that's how it started. And today it's, I'm trying things every single day that will up my wellness and my health game.

[00:17:49] And just like, how can I be the better version of myself than I was yesterday? 

[00:17:54] Jeremy: Your story is exactly what we tell people on the show all the time is that it always starts with some small thing which opens one door and then opens another and then opens another. And the more you pursue that, and the more curious you get on that, on that journey, the more you end up better, healthier, a healthier version of yourself.

[00:18:13] But I want to go back to that moment when you said that's enough, I'm ready for a change. That that is the moment for whatever it is that you're trying to do. Quit your job, start a business, get in shape, eat better. That moment has to happen, or you will fail. You have to just decide and commit to whatever the change is.

[00:18:35] So for you, it was very much a rock bottom sort of life or death decision. What can you say to someone who's maybe not there and maybe their decision isn't a life or death? It's a, I just want to, whatever the thing is, maybe it's not so drastic, but how does someone get to the point to make that decision to pursue whatever that goal is to go after it, with that same level of commitment as though it's to save their life.

[00:19:02] Megan: Well, it's such an interesting thing. 

[00:19:04] Megan Pherrill: I think everybody has to hit their version of rock bottom and it doesn't necessarily have to be so drastic. Like mine. It can literally be like, 

[00:19:13] Megan: I'm just tired of Hating looking in the mirror and seeing myself it's like, that could be your rock bottom, your rock bottom can be like, 

[00:19:22] Megan Pherrill: I'm just tired of feeling tired all the time.

[00:19:24] And maybe if I eat a little healthier, it'll give me the energy. I think it just, it really, really does come down to a decision and a commitment. And I feel like that's not the answer everybody wants. Like everybody wants this magical answer. And it's like, we all know those people. They know they should change, but they're obviously not in enough pain that they're willing to make that change and that 

[00:19:48] difference.

[00:19:49] And it doesn't have to be 

[00:19:50] Megan: I'm. 

[00:19:50] Megan Pherrill: I have to lose 200 pounds or I have to revamp my entire diet. It can be a very, very small thing, but 

[00:19:59] Megan: it is, 

[00:20:00] Megan Pherrill: it is your rock bottom. And it is that decision that you're, that you're willing to change 

[00:20:06] Megan: and pick one thing, like 

[00:20:08] maybe you're like my whole life has to be redone.

[00:20:10] Like. Oh, my God. Let's just start like you have the rest of your life to make those changes. Pick the one thing that is that you struggle with the most and that you want to change the most and everything will naturally fall into place from there. 

[00:20:25] Zach: So with all the things that you have done, , same thing with me, right?

[00:20:28] It's it was never one big thing. It was always these so many little things of all of the, and I asked this because I. paint the picture and give people perspective. Right. I have done a million little things to help myself of those million. Only a small percentage of them actually worked and did something for me. So I want to like, turn that around to you. Like how many, you know, if you had to guess, like how many things have you tried that didn't work, that didn't move the needle that didn't actually. Give you, what you were looking for and you had to say, Nope. Nope. That wasn't for me, 

[00:21:09] Megan: that's an interesting question because I don't, well, the yoga first, right.

[00:21:15] I tried that and I was like, nah, not for me. And it came back to me in a time in my life where I really, really needed it. So you could even argue that like yoga was the thing at first that I tried and. This sucks. Then I got into it. I've never really been one to lift weights. I literally just started lifting weights two weeks ago.

[00:21:36] I tried to go to a gym and be the person who lifted weights. And it wasn't for me at that time, I've tried, you know, certain, I I've never really been a huge diet person, so it's not like I can ever say, oh, I was vegan or I was paleo or keto. Like I'm very much the type of person who's like, just eat really well and eat in moderation.

[00:22:01] Like I'm never going to be someone who turns down a birthday cake. I love sweets, but I'm also very disciplined now. You know what I actually do have it, you know, meditation was one thing that I had tried didn't resonate with it. Then I tried it in the evening. Didn't love it in the evening. I switched to the morning and meditation is one of those things that I like.

[00:22:24] Megan Pherrill: If I could make everybody in the world meditate, I would, because it's been so life-changing for me. So I think it's one of these things too. Like maybe you've tried something in the past and you're like, no, I like, I don't do weights Those are not my thing. If you're starting to feel curious about it or you're like, Hey, I just feel like trying it again, like roll with that.

[00:22:45] Try it out. Maybe it didn't work in the past, but now, it will 

[00:22:49] Jeremy: I literally just went through that, uh, like six weeks ago. So it's a, it's very funny that you bring that up. Um, I do want to talk about, uh, the role that yoga and meditation played in your healing. I mean, we're talking some pretty deep stuff with suicidal tendencies with cutting all that stuff. Talk about how yoga and meditation help you with and meditate and medication.

[00:23:10] I should say similar for me where I was on it. It's just a very numbing experience. It just sort of takes all of the highs and lows away. And you just sort of coast. Uh it's uh, it's it wasn't pleasant. So I'm curious how you have found relief through a yoga and meditation to, to manage because mental health is a massive burden and, and I'm just curious how those, those practices have helped you manage that issue.

[00:23:37] Megan: It's one of those things. Like I would like, I'm not a medical doctor. I would never say like, you don't need the medication. I do believe in holistic practices over medication, if you can, but there does become a point 

[00:23:54] where it, you know, Western medicine has been incredible for a lot of different people.

[00:24:00] And if you really feel like I am on the brink of falling off of that edge, and I don't know what to do. Do the medication, I don't know where the, the day was or the thought was, or the change was where I just decided, Hey, I don't want to do these meds anymore. I, you know, I went to, I was seeing a therapist weekly and it even got to a point with my therapist where I felt like I had done all the work that I needed to then.

[00:24:30] And I, I almost felt like it was keeping me in the past. Like we would talk about. The sexual abuse, we would talk about my suicidal tendencies and I was like, I'm ready to kind of just move on. So for me, it was a very clean, , walk away. I had been seeing her since I was eight years old and I just felt like it was time to move on.

[00:24:55] And it really wasn't internal. Like it's time to move on Megan. For me, I just, I didn't want to be on meds anymore. And I think it's one of those kinds of reactions. A lot of doctors will give is like, here's some meds, a it's, you know, it's what they're trained in. It's what they know B. Maybe my doctor felt like, man, she might not make it till tomorrow if I don't give her these things. But I just, I didn't like they w the way they were making me feel. People in my world, around me reliving lives and they were happy. And it was like, how do I get like that too? And the meds just aren't doing it 

[00:25:37] for me anymore. And so it was a very gradual thing of just incorporating more yoga into my life so that I was completely off the medication.

[00:25:49] And the way that yoga made me feel was a thousand times better than being on the meds. And I was just like, this is a great feeling. How can I do it every single day? 

[00:25:59] Zach: I know my own personal story with yoga was, I tried yoga just because I was having a side effect of a medication that 

[00:26:07] was making my hands and my feet tingle. And it was like, I just need to stretch more and went and tried yoga. And, and I tried it at the moment where it meant something to me and it actually changed my life, , from the perspective of mindset and meditation and things like that. So I, I totally get how it can change , how you're feeling, but I'd love to hear a little bit more about how you think yoga does do that.

[00:26:36] Why is it doing that? I mean, It's just a bunch of people in the room stretching or, or is it 

[00:26:42] Megan: right? So I never went to a studio. I was literally so embarrassed that, and not embarrassed about the fact that I was doing yoga. I've always been, like I was saying a smaller person. So people automatically think that I should be some sort of flexible, strong person.

[00:27:00] And I was like the opposite of that. Like I could barely touch my toes. Like the idea of a plank was laughable at that point. So I was just like in my basement at home doing it. And I threw on YouTube. And the first power video was by a girl named Courtney bell. I don't even know if she does anything anymore. But , then it was like, since I was doing it, yoga talks just like randomly came into my world. Like I heard somebody talking about yoga with Adrian and I was like, oh God sounds cool. Like, I'll give her a shot. And as a beginner, she's amazing. She's someone who I think really incorporates a lot of like philosophical talks into her yoga classes without it being very. Overwhelming or you're like, what in the world is she talking about? But it was just, you know, I'd be at home and she would just be like, you know, take a deep breath into the belly and rib cage. And that alone was like, oh, like, oh my God. Like, it immediately makes me feel better. Obviously I'm a chest breather.

[00:28:06] Like I couldn't breathe through my nose for the life of me. I was always a mouth breather and they went and saw all these doctors and they're like, there's nothing. Like really, you don't have a deviated septum. There's nothing medically that should be making you not breathe through your nose. And on the mat, when she would say things like that, all of a sudden I would be like, oh my God, I can breathe through my nose.

[00:28:29] This is, this is crazy. And I just wouldn't notice, like I would come to my mat and sometimes they would be sad or flustered or a little frustrated. And while my physical body was starting to change, all of a sudden I could touch my toes and hold those planks. I would just notice I would finish a 20 minute video and I would feel better and people would ask me like, oh, well, like what is it that you feel better about now? I don't, I don't really know. There's not a pinpoint like, oh, I have just feeling better about this specific thing. I would just overall feel a little calmer and feel a little more grounded. And people in my world started to notice, you know, my mom made a few comments where she was like, wow, you just seem like in the past, this would kind of freak you out and you seem a lot more calm about it.

[00:29:22] Like you, you just seem a little bit more. Open and happier. Even the idea of going to downtown Toronto used to give me so much anxiety. And then when I was dating, Husband or my boyfriend at the time, I would have no problem with doing those things. So people were like, oh wow. Like you really are starting to change.

[00:29:44] And I think it was those little things that started to kind of compound and make me feel like, Hey, there is something literally to this yoga journey and I don't know really what it is, but it's just making me feel happier overall.

[00:29:59] Jeremy: It's funny. Yoga is such a, , I guess, analogy for, for this journey, because it is, you start tight and you can't touch your toes. And then after a couple of weeks, all of a sudden you're like, oh, I can touch my toes. And then all of a sudden you're on the floor and you're like, wow, I can reach the bottom.

[00:30:11] It's just those little, it's just day to day, it builds up and it gets better and it gets better. Th the journey that you've been on has opened a lot of doors for you and introduced you to different things. One of the things that you're into now, , that I'm very curious about as human design and I can hear the audience going, what the, what, so tell us what human design is , and what we should know.

[00:30:33] Megan: I explain human design to people, I tell people It is your energetic blueprint. It is how you were meant to optimally thrive in the world. It's how you make the best decisions for yourself. It's how to know when you're in alignment and out of alignment. And it's based off the off of the chakra system, astrology, quantum physics, the Chang, and the Kabbalah, and it takes all these different modalities from it.

[00:30:57] And. Put it into what is called, like a human design chart and human design first came to me. I heard somebody, a girlfriend of mine talk about it. And I was like, all right, like humans and sign. Okay. And then somebody had posted an Instagram post about finding out about their human design. And I was like, wow, weird.

[00:31:19] Okay. Like, that's two people I've heard. And I heard it on a podcast and it literally dawned to me, I was like, maybe there's a reason why all of a sudden you're hearing about human design and it was at this time, like I was trying to build my business and I was doing all the business workshops and all the courses, but I was still struggling with. Feeling confident in myself and, , I found myself burning out a lot and I was very confused because I was like, man, I really love what I do. I love teaching yoga. I love building this business, but like, why am I burning out all the time? And my girlfriend was like, Hey, it's a free chart.

[00:31:58] Just do it. And just see what's coming up. And I'll explain a little bit of what I know about it. So I went to a human design. Website. It's like my body As long as you have your exact birth time, that's really important. Your birth location. As micro as you can get, and your date of birth, you can get your human design. And I plugged in all of this information and it popped up and it was like, you are a projector. And I was reading about being a projector and it's like, you are the people who are supposed to be the leaders, the guides, the teachers of the world. You don't work a regular set of hours. So like a corporate job, a nine to five, isn't ideal for you. You have bursts of energy and then you need to do a lot of things to recoup that energy. I'm reading it. my God, this is me to achieve. And one of the things for me was the best way for you to recoup is sleep. I was like, oh my God, this is me to a T because my evening routine is very specific. If I don't sleep well. Like the rest of the world, better, like look out because I am just bat shit about getting a good night's sleep. And I'm reading this thing and I'm crying because it's like, this is literally explained why I'm burning out as much as I am. It's telling me the best way for me to make decisions. And it's one of those things like Jeremy, you and I were talking before about this. You learn about it and you're, you're, not surprised because. I've never been able to articulate how I am as a person. And this thing has just literally pinpointed me to a T and now I fully fully get it. Like I don't look at anything in my chart and go, Hm. That doesn't really seem like me. Like everything is like, I couldn't describe myself better if I tried then like what this chart is telling me.

[00:33:53] Jeremy: It is pretty crazy. As you mentioned, we chatted a bit before we started recording and, uh, knowing we'd be talking about this and knowing nothing about human design, I did exactly what you described. I went to some random site on, on the Google machine and punched in all of my information and the, I mean, there's a ton of stuff that, that resonated, but the thing that really struck me is.

[00:34:13] You know, last July I moved from the city. I moved, I was in Seattle. I now live in, in the mountainous environment of, uh, British Columbia and my environment, according to this chart is mountains. And that's where I get perspective. It's where I feel like a, it's a conducive environment for me to get clarity and information.

[00:34:32] I came here with the intention of. Healing. Right. And, and pursuing the, the life that I was put here to live and not the one that I just sort of fell into, uh, leading up to that. That was the part that really jumped out. I was like, wow, that, that is dead on. , but also just little things like, um, that when I'm not living my best life, it, it manifests as frustration, which I would imagine for most people that is the case.

[00:34:59] but my type is a generator. So what can you tell me about what it is to be a general.

[00:35:04] Megan: So there's different types of energies. When it comes to human design, there's the generator, the manifesting generator, the manifestor, the projector and the reflector generators are meant to do what they love every single day. The more that you do, something that you love, the more that you generate energy.

[00:35:23] So it's the same with manifesting generators. You guys are what I like to call like the Gary V's of the world. If you're doing what you love, you can literally go. 24 7. My husband's a generator. He does the same thing. Like there are times where I'm like, babe, like it's night time. Like I'm trying to relax.

[00:35:41] And he's like, no, I just learned about this thing in my business. And now how can I implement this into my life? Like, it's. It's very fun energy to be around. That's not to say you don't need breaks. You absolutely do. And for you, like you were saying, it's the mountain. So it's going out into nature. It's going to the mountains to regenerate that energy and to get some perspective.

[00:36:02] And then going back to things that you truly love to do, generators are also the type of energy that. Once you feel like you've mastered the thing that you're meant to you're ready to move on to something else. So a lot of generators that I've done charts for, or that are in my space. seem to like jump from job, to job, to job. And it's, they're like, I don't really know why. I just like, I'm done with that job. I'm ready to move on to another one. It's like, of course you've mastered that job. You feel as confident as you are in a, you've gotten what you've needed to from it. Now it's time to move on to the next thing and to master that thing. So manifesting generators and generators, you guys can just always keep that energy going. Manifesting. Generators tend to have that. What I like to call like that shiny object syndrome. They're the type that are like, man. Like I'm interested in so many different things. I love to talk about travel. I love to talk about yoga.

[00:37:03] I love to talk about human design. I love to talk about business. Like they have so many. Things that light them up. And it's the same thing with generators. If you're out of alignment, you expressed frustration. And sometimes that can look like anger. Like it doesn't necessarily have to be , frustration, but sadness, because you're frustrated with how things are going in your life, or you're not quite making the steps and the moves that you'd had hoped that you were aware you were at. Manifesting generators are the same thing they need to do what lights them up. But whereas generators can be a little bit more slow and steady. Like they like to go from. Then I need to master B. Now I need to master see manifesting generators can be like, I'm doing a B oh step and looks kind of cool.

[00:37:52] Maybe I'll hop to 

[00:37:53] that. And then, oh crap. I should have relearn how to do that in my business. And I have to go back to see, and then it's like, now I want to get to the finish line. So you tried to go there and then you're like, Ooh, like I should have gone back to D so they can bounce around a little bit.

[00:38:07] And whereas they seem to kind of get to points faster. Sometimes they have to go back. Re build out that, those steps.

[00:38:15] Jeremy: I don't even need Zach's information to know he's a manifest, manifesting general.

[00:38:19] Zach: I haven't taken the test yet, but you are describing me right there. 

[00:38:22] Megan: So it's crazy when you find out about yourself, you're like, oh my God. And then ma manifestors are, it's the, name's a little deceiving because it's not like they're great at manifesting over other people. They're just, they're here to be the leaders in the sense of like, they are like the CEO generators or. They're the workers. They, they like to help build out things, whereas manifestors are like, I like to tell people kind of what to do, but they're also not so great about asking for help.

[00:38:53] So manifestors and generators or manifesting generators work really well together because the manifestor can be like this, this and this and the generator, the manifesting generator can help implement. So I always say like, with manifestors like you have to stop and you have to ask for help, but a lot of the time they'll feel shy too, or they feel like, well, they just won't understand what the big picture is that I'm trying to go for.

[00:39:20] But you have to be the initiator. You have to tell people what it is that you were looking for in order for your dream or vision to come to fruition. The projector is much more of that leader that guides. So when I'm out of alignment, it shows up as bitterness in my life, which is like, if you want to describe me to a T it's like, that's 

[00:39:44] literally like, that's how I know when I'm out of alignment because I'll feel jealous or bitter about what's going on in my world. And then when I'm in alignment, I feel successful. So we are not meant to work a corporate nine to five. Like I'm someone who very much works really well between like 10 and two o'clock throughout the day. So I usually have a morning routine that sets me up and then I get to work. And then usually by two or three, I'm like, I'm done.

[00:40:13] Like, my energy is just depleted. I'm done for the day. When I worked corporate, that was even kind of how I worked. I could get more done than anybody in the office, but it was between those like two hours. And then I was like, eh, I'm kind of like, I'm tired now. I don't really know. I don't want to put in any more work. And then reflectors, they're the rare ones of the world, but they are literally here to like reflect energy back to, to the other person. So they tend to be the people who take the longest to kind of make decisions. The people that they surround themselves with and the environment really, really dictate their energy.

[00:40:53] If there was somebody who's kind of negative. Or bad vibes, just like any of the G types this comes into play, but especially with reflectors, because they're reflecting that back so they can kind of. Amplify either really, really great positive energy or really, really negative. And the other person can kind of see that reflected back to them.

[00:41:16] So that's like the very micro overview of like what the energy types is it. I mean, it does. So deep into like your fears and dives into how to make decisions, you can look at your chart and figure out, like, what is the best way for you to consume food? Are you someone who likes to be around other people or do you like to be alone? Do you like to do it in the day time? Like when it's bright and sunny out or are you more of like, you know, I like it to be very like Twilight out while I'm eating my breakfast. Like, it gets very micro.

[00:41:48] Zach: .

[00:41:48] Well, now, now I have to go take the test because I want to confirm my theory of manifesting generator. And that's the part that I'm really interested in is, , truly what is the best way for me to do the things that I need to do to make sure I'm healthy and happy and, and all the things. . So I really just want to ask the one last quick question is, , we talked about it earlier, that there's a thousand little things that we all do to, you know, to get better, but if somebody kind of in that moment where they're there at their bottom and they want to take the next step and they want to be better. What's, , one or two small things that they can start with to start going down that journey. 

[00:42:31] Megan: What I would say to someone is to just get quiet with yourself. And before someone's like, Nope, wrong answer and pauses, and like leaves this podcast episode. I think we can get so distracted by what other people tell us we should be doing. Or we saw in line that this person was doing this type of workout. So maybe that'll work, like, just get really quiet with yourself. And this doesn't have to be an. Meditation in your mind, just take a few minutes close on all distractions, ask yourself what is the next step for me? And you know, like deep down, you know, what it is that you need to do and don't let the mind, or the ego say, well, you know, like, but you actually have to do this first or like, Hmm.

[00:43:16] we don't have the right equipment to be doing that. Like if the thing that you're coming up with is like, start walking. Lead with that start walking 10 minutes every single day. You know, it doesn't have to be this big thing park further away in the parking lot while you're going to the grocery store, take the stairs, as opposed to taking an elevator, ask yourself what it is that you need to start doing. And go with that. Like, you know, what's best for yourself. The next thing I would say. Start to surround yourself with people who want the best for you and some people are like, well, I don't have anybody. I don't have family. I live on my own. This is the world of social media. Find people online who are rooting for you or who are at least inspiring and encouraging for you. If someone is trying to drag you down, like, it sounds harsh, but I'm a big believer in like, you don't have to be mean about it, but let that person go from your life. Like if they're not helping you to at least move the needle forward, or at least, you know, like, Hey, I absolutely refuse to go on walks all day on with you during the day, but I'm cheering for you.

[00:44:31] Like, I'll shoot you a text every day that just says. go, Megan, you can do this. Like find the people who can help you accountable and at least be your cheerleader. And then just go from there, drink a little bit more water throughout the day. Even if it's half a glass, just that's a big one too.

[00:44:52] Just, you know, do little micro things every single day that helped move the needle 

[00:44:58] for. 

[00:44:59] Jeremy: Speaking of people that can be an inspiration online. I think you are certainly one of them. Where can listeners find out more about you in the work that.

[00:45:06] Megan: Thank you both for the opportunity for this conversation. If people want to follow along with me, I'm just at balanced by Megan, M E G H a M on all podcast platforms. I have a podcast called balance your life. You two are going to be on it, which I'm very excited about. So you can find. You know, my self on there, plus really other inspiring motivational guests And speakers.

[00:45:31] So balance your life podcast or balanced by Megan and me, G H N across all social media platforms.

[00:45:39] Jeremy: Our thanks to Megan Farrell. She's the host of the balance. Your life podcast. You'll find links to her and her show in the show notes for this 

[00:45:46] And her point about trying things again, even if they sucked last time, or you didn't like them, or you didn't think they were. I mean, I'm living that right now. How, how many times did I complain to Zach? About how much I was never going to go to the gym again?

[00:45:58] Because it sucks because it's boring. I don't want, I don't want to look back on my life and go to all the hours. I wasted lifting heavy shit in that room by myself. How depressing is that?

[00:46:08] Zach: Every day.

[00:46:08] Jeremy: Every day. And now I go Every day.

[00:46:11] and I lift the heavy shit because I want my body to feel better. I want to be stronger.

[00:46:15] I want to be able to live the life that I imagined living, not the one that I, you know, at some point end up wishing I was able to do. So that that part really hit home for me is that you might've tried yoga before and gone? Nah, not for me. That sucks. You might've tried meditating before and God that's too hard.

[00:46:31] I can't do it. I can't sit still long enough. You might've gone to the gym and gone. This is bullshit. I'm never doing this again. Try it again. Try it a different way. Try it with a different coach, get a coach, find somebody that can help you get through that roadblock to actually make progress on the thing.

[00:46:47] And maybe you'll find that the growing through that is what you need to help you grow in other ways in your. 

[00:46:53] Zach: , a lot of these things that make you uncomfortable in the beginning. Can be the best thing for you and you can grow to love. I know when I started doing yoga, I was, I mean, I really just felt like a beached whale, like just flopping around and I didn't know what I was doing.

[00:47:10] I was watching everyone else and they were like looking down at their mat. I had to look up at the instructor, no clue. I hated it, hated every minute of it. And , after like two months, it just kind of clicked. And I was like, oh, This is great. This is wonderful. , you just have to get to that uncomfort point.

[00:47:28] And a lot of these new things that we try, they come with a learning curve. That's steep enough to scare you away, but once you get to that plateau, man, it's butter.

[00:47:38] Jeremy: Well, and a lot of times it does come down to the fact that you're not uncomfortable enough with your current life. To try a different kind of discomfort, like the weed, which we kind of joke about it all the time. You got to get sick enough of your own shit to make a change, 

[00:47:52] Zach: Well, that's what my therapist told me that one day. Remember she was like, she was like, you're not making the changes that, you know, you need to make because you're not uncomfortable enough.

[00:48:01] Jeremy: Yeah,

[00:48:02] So if you want to get uncomfortable, do it. That's where the growth happens because sitting there wishing and hoping and thinking that things are going to just magically change. You have to actually do something different. And it usually involves getting really uncomfortable for awhile. So, I mean, I'm not saying go join a yoga studio and plan on going every day for a year, but go 

[00:48:22] Zach: although that wouldn't be bad.

[00:48:24] Jeremy: that wouldn't be bad, but go for a month, go for two.

[00:48:26] Like she said, jump on, jump on the YouTubes. There's all kinds of yoga classes on there. There's, there's just an infinite amount of free information and tools and exercises that are available online, that there really is no reason to not try something different. If what you're doing now, isn't working. 

[00:48:45] Zach: But if you do want to try something different and you haven't been able to find anything free out there, you can always join us in our Facebook group and ask us and the other people who are listening to the show that are in there. It's a really great community that we are doing a monthly challenge this month.

[00:49:01] And I have you been doing a Jeremy.

[00:49:04] Jeremy: I do it every day. Just the first five minutes of my life has always brutal. But, but yes, , there have been a couple of days. So, so the challenge has been, uh, particularly with working out that if you don't feel like you're able to do it, you don't, you feel too tired, whatever, excuse you're throwing at yourself.

[00:49:19] Go give it five minutes. And if you are still too tired, go back to bed, go get the rest. You need, take it easy that day, whatever you need to do. But there have been a few days where I say to him, God, I just don't have it in me today. It's not there that the tank is empty. My ring is even telling me I didn't get enough rest and I'm not ready for this.

[00:49:38] And then I go and I do it. And five minutes in, I'm fine. And I've gotten that far. I put the shoes on. I walked out the door. That was the hardest part. The second hardest part was the first five minutes. And then it's just, you know, lift the heavy things and shut the hell up and get the word. 

[00:49:51] Zach: I actually have struggled a little bit this week because I went to Florida for two weeks and visited Disneyworld and walked a hundred miles. Did all kinds of things. My routine is completely thrown off. So like when my alarm goes off at five 30, I have skipped the gym twice this 

[00:50:07] Jeremy: Oh, 

[00:50:08] Zach: twice. 

[00:50:10] Jeremy: in you. That's not like you come on. 

[00:50:13] Zach: it's, not, and I'm, I'm kicking myself because I skipped it this morning.

[00:50:17] And then two other days this week I had meetings at six 30 in the morning, so I couldn't go to the gym. So I've only been to the gym once the.

[00:50:23] Jeremy: , this is another one of those things. I tell my kids all the time, you're going to regret the things you don't do. Way more than the things that you do. You're not going to go. You're not going to regret working out unless you hurt yourself, but you're not going to regret. You're going to regret it way more.

[00:50:35] If you're like, oh, I'm going to take it easy on myself today. And I'm not going to go, or I'm not today. I'm going to eat whatever I want, because I just feel like. You're you're going to regret that stuff way more than, than putting in the work, but that is going to do it for this episode. We will be back next week at our website, the with a brand new episode.

[00:50:52] Thank you so much for listening. 

Meghan PherrillProfile Photo

Meghan Pherrill


Meghan Pherrill Gordon is the creator of Balance by Meghan, an online community designed to empower and inspire you on your wellness journey so you can be the best version of yourself. Meghan is the host of Balance Your Life Podcast, a 500 hour yoga teacher, a meditation teacher and trainer, wellness influencer and Human Design reader. She lives in Nova Scotia with her husband, loves to travel (when there isn't a pandemic), practice yoga, get outside in nature, and geeks out over anything wellness.