Oct. 4, 2022

Don't Fake It Til You Make It - Be It Till You See It With Lesley Logan

Don't Fake It Til You Make It - Be It Till You See It With Lesley Logan

Our guest is Lesley Logan, a certified Pilates teacher, breathwork, habits, and mindset coach, and host of the Be It Till You See It podcast.


Summary

Our guest is Lesley Logan, a certified Pilates teacher, breathwork, habits, and mindset coach, and host of the Be It Till You See It podcast.

About the episode

Somewhere in the back of your mind is a better version of yourself. Someone who is a little more successful, a little more confident, a little happier. So what would it take to actually become that person?

Changing your mindset to believe that you can and will succeed can help you overcome any obstacle. The first step is to realize that you have the power to change the course of your life. Once you understand that, you can begin to take steps to reach your goals.

One way to do that is to simply "Be it Till You See It." That's great advice but it's also the name of a terrific podcast hosted by Lesley Logan, a certified Pilates teacher, breathwork, habits, and mindset coach. In this episode, Logan shares practical advice on how to build a “see it” mentality, and reminds us that success is not about being perfect, but learning to be open to mistakes.

What We Discuss with Lesley:

  • How to act as though you’re already the person you’re trying to become
  • Perfect is boring
  • Messy action is better than inaction
  • Why you should only compare yourself to the past version of you
  • Why mistakes are some of our best teachers
  • Why coaches and teachers are needed throughout our lifetime

Don’t let the conversation end there. Join us in our Facebook Group where you and fellow Fit Mess listeners can connect for monthly challenges, accountability to reach your goals, and a supportive community. 

Like this show? Please leave us a review here – even one sentence helps! Post a screenshot of you listening on Instagram & tag us so we can thank you personally!

Resources:

Guest Website

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If you enjoyed this episode, check out: 

How To Tap Into Inner Calm, Develop A Positive Mindset And Heal From The Stress That Is Holding You Back With Sara Raymond

Transcript

[00:00:00] Jeremy: Coming up today on the fit mess.

[00:00:01] Lesley: take a moment and picture yourself. It can be one year from now. Where do you wanna be living? How do you wanna be showing up? What job are you doing? Like give yourself a picture of you in that moment. And then I actually want you to go, okay.

[00:00:12] What's the first next step.

[00:00:14] Zach: That's Leslie Logan. She's a certified Pilates and mindset coach And host of the, be it till you see it podcast today, we'll talk with her about the small steps you can take today to be a better version of you tomorrow.

[00:00:26] 

[00:00:47] Jeremy: one of the things we like to talk about on the show is the idea of not comparing yourself to other people, because there's, someone's always got baggage. They've always got their stuff. There's, it's just not a good idea to compare yourself to others, but it can be helpful to compare yourself to you yesterday so that you can see the progress you've made, the things you've done to get to where you are today and to appreciate how far you've.

[00:01:09] There is one other comparison that can be helpful. And it's the version of you tomorrow and the things that that person is doing to be successful and, and to have the things that they want to have, and you can learn the lessons from that person by imagining how they live their life. What are the things that they do every day?

[00:01:26] Do they go to the gym every day? Did they eat the things that they wanted to eat that day? Did they get enough water? Did they go to bed on time? All those things that you know of that that better version of you would do. To start implementing them sort of one at a time in really small ways to become that person.

[00:01:44] I think in some, I think there are times when that can be a helpful comparison to bring to your life

[00:01:48] Zach: I generally agree with that. I definitely agree with the comparing yourself to yourself yesterday, right? . Whenever I compare myself to somebody else, they had a different life. They had a different childhood, they had a different everything, but when you're comparing yourself to yourself, it's apples and apples, like it is the same baggage day for day that you know, that you carried around.

[00:02:09] So I really love that fact that like what I am today in comparison to what I was yesterday. is different, even though like I had all that shit that happened to me. , but I agree, like going forward, , sometimes you just have to be that person, your future self already, and imagine what they're doing or what they would do and how they would do it and just take it on and do it and become that person.

[00:02:34] Like you're, you're the guy who you were the weird guy who rode his bike to work every day. I was the weird guy who quit smoking. . I still remember like envisioning myself quitting smoking and like being the guy who doesn't smoke and it made me sad , the withdrawal of nicotine, like kicked in immediately. And like, it made me sad, made me really unhappy, but I was like, you know what, I'm gonna be that guy.

[00:02:55] I'm gonna be that.

[00:02:56] Jeremy: Yeah, there's a lot of things like that. My therapist, actually, I was sharing this, , analogy with him once about the idea of imagining the person you wanna become and taking the, the steps that that person would take. And he was quick to point out that person and you are the same person. You have the ability to do all of that stuff right now. And I agree with him, but I also know that if I did all of the things that the tomorrow version of. Needs to do to be happy. I would quit after two weeks because I'd be overwhelmed.

[00:03:28] It would be too much of a life change to take on at once. And, and it would be self-defeating

[00:03:33] Zach: So you're saying small steps,

[00:03:35] Jeremy: small steps. It's something that we talk about all the time. Just take those tiny baby steps, add one thing at a time for a little while, until it becomes habit. And then add another one and keep going and keep going and keep going.

[00:03:48] Zach: Well, if it's that simple, I've been doing it wrong the whole time

[00:03:51] Jeremy: Yeah, you just, you just eat the whole elephant in one bite.

[00:03:54] Zach: I try to, and then that usually involves some. Pain and tears and crying and things like that. And, and then I, and then I slim down my diet.

[00:04:06] Well, whether I'm slimming my diet or not slimming my diet, , I can't myself just with my lifestyle and everything that's going on. I have a lot of trouble getting all of my nutrients from the food that I eat. and so I need a supplement. I need something that's good for me and healthy, and that's why I take athletic. 

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[00:04:50] Mess to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. You can also find that link on our website, the fit mess.com.

[00:04:57] All our guest today is Leslie Logan. She's a certified Pilates and mindset coach and host of the, be it till you see it podcast. And that's where we started the conversation. What does it mean to her to be it till you.

[00:05:08] Lesley: When I think of VTO C first of all, I actually didn't know this is something I was doing already in life, but I was getting a question. How are you so confident you do so many things?

[00:05:17] Like, I just wish I could be as confident as you. And I was like, I am like scared to death. Like I , I don't know what I'm doing. What are you, what are you seeing? And so I started to have to like, take like a bird's eye view of like, how is doing life? How is making decisions, like what was going on in that process?

[00:05:32] And what I discovered is that in everything I was doing, that they thought I was so confident in that, like, just doing the thing, I was acting like the person who knew what they were. In those moments. So be it till you see it is not like fake until you make it all. It's a more positive version of that, but, , there's a lot that changes in your brain and how you show up when you are.

[00:05:53] Almost playing the role of the person that you believe could do the thing you wanna do instead of waiting until the thing happens. And then you're gonna step up and let me just say like, think about if you wanna be a speaker, right? Like you wanna speak on stage and you wanna be like Oprah and you wanna speak on stage.

[00:06:09] Do you really wanna, like, you're not gonna speak until it's 30,000 people in the audience. No way that's gonna scare the hell outta you. Right. But. You get five people in a coffee shop that you're speaking in front of, you can act as if someone who does speak to 30,000 people in that room. And first of all, you're gonna touch all five of those people.

[00:06:28] They're gonna feel so special. And then you're gonna start to see the room, fill and fill with more people because you are creating that space and you're acting like the person who can do that versus just waiting until someone deems you ready, and then You're 

[00:06:40] not gonna feel ready. You're gonna 

[00:06:41] feel like an imposter. 

[00:06:42] Jeremy: we we waste so much time waiting for someone else to validate that for us. Don't. 

[00:06:46] Lesley: Yeah. Oh, so much. And like, I don't know. Well, here's the thing. I, I mean, I think we can go and go back to way everyone's educated. Everyone's raised, we're all just waiting for the promotion. We're waiting for the big guy up top to like, notice you and say you you're doing a great job, but the reality is, is everyone's so busy and everyone's so involved with themselves that they are not thinking about you.

[00:07:05] And so they might be thinking in their head like, oh, that person's really great. They're not actually telling you that. And you waiting for someone to say, you're ready is actually like, you could wait your whole life for that. And that will, it probably will never happen. But if you can you take yourself and go, who is it that I wanna be?

[00:07:21] What would that person do? How does that person make decisions? Then you start to take on that role. You will start to show up in that, say, if you wanna be a millionaire, well then how does a millionaire get ready for the day? Like you don't have to like, actually have the Mercedes-Benz and have the dream house yet, but you can go.

[00:07:38] Does a millionaire hit snooze 17 times. Does a millionaire yell at the dog, does a millionaire leave dishes in the sink? Like what does a millionaire do in their morning routine? You can start to have a millionaire's routine right now. You, if you wanna be someone who's like super healthy and you're like, well, when I lose 20 pounds, then I'll do this.

[00:07:55] Okay. The person that's, you, that's lost the weight that you wanna do. How do they eat breakfast? How, what do they do in their 

[00:08:00] day? How Do they structure it? you can start to have that life

[00:08:03] today

[00:08:04] just by being it until you. 

[00:08:05] Jeremy: I think that's so 

[00:08:06] interesting too, because combining those two ideas where you're waiting for validation from someone else to be the person that you want to. But somehow by taking that person out of your own head, sort of, and putting them next to you, somehow, that person has more value than the person that you are, right?

[00:08:24] Like you can easily go, oh, well, well that guy wouldn't walk by this basket of laundry and just let it sit there, piled up. that guy would throw a load in and then he would go back to work or whatever it is that he's doing. But when it's me, when I put it, on me, I'm like, oh God, that just put in. That's good.

[00:08:38] I gotta carve out an hour and a half to load up that washing machine. I don't, I can't do that's too much for me right now. There's just something about taking that identity and not, not completely removing yourself. but, but setting it as a goal that allows you to sort of believe in your ability to become that person 

[00:08:55] Lesley: 100%. And also, like, I think we've told ourselves we've sold ourselves stories about who we are, that some, maybe they're not even what you said, maybe it's somebody in your life, your parent, your grandparent, maybe they said something offhand comment when you're five years old, but it's somehow stuck with you.

[00:09:10] And it's just like taking up space in that brain rent free. And it's just like on, on a loop that you play, like. Maybe, maybe you didn't do the laundry correctly when you were little. And so actually instead of you think it's gonna take an hour and a half to laundry, you just don't think you're good enough to do laundry because you like put the colors with the whites one day and like everything came out pink. Right.

[00:09:28] So like, It's interesting. What we grew up with that we keep with us that tells a story. So then we see someone else and then we tell a different story about them. We're like, their life is easy, they have it all together. And so it's like, okay, great. If that's what you think, how are they doing it though?

[00:09:42] How, what can you take from them that you could bring to you? And it's really incredible when people do that, they are able to make massive change in their life. And the reality is is that like, . Most everything we do in life, we learn from somebody else. We emulate someone else. When you're learning how to drive a car, you spent many years before actually behind the wheel sitting next that looking at it, watching how they do it, whether they're yelling at the person next to them or being peaceful or not, it's a whole different story.

[00:10:08] But We, watch that when we go to cook, learn how to cook. You are next to someone cooking. You see that. So it makes sense to like that it would be easier to see someone else and be able to emulate that. That makes sense to me. actually have to do the thing. And what happens is we see that and we actually don't take on, we're like, oh, that's for 

[00:10:27] them.

[00:10:27] That's not for 

[00:10:28] me. 

[00:10:29] Jeremy: speaking of taking action. One of the things you, you preach on your show is taking messy action, which is something that, uh, obviously rang true for us when, when We, heard that. so talk about that, that messy action, the, the failing forward, all that thing, all those things you have to just do, you have to just take those steps and do those things to make those dreams and goals happen.

[00:10:47] Right. 

[00:10:47] Lesley: Oh my gosh. So this happened because I'm. I was a perfectionist as a child. Like it was like debilitating perfectionism over Gever. Hi, I'm a first born raised by two first born. So like 

[00:11:00] Right, Like there's a lot there. And all I learned was that like, even when someone was perfect, which is all so contextual, it was in that moment.

[00:11:09] And the next day you ought do it all over again. right.

[00:11:11] Like it's only perfect for that moment. It's not like. You get to like ride that wave of perfection. You gotta start again. And I also learned that every time I did something so perfectly a it like, kind of like went out with, like, it went out into the world without any impact celebration whatsoever.

[00:11:27] I, I poured all this into it, but people don't see the blood, sweat and tears behind the things that you're doing. And they often don't realize that you spent 17 hours making that Instagram post. Like they just don't. And so really what I had to learn was that like, just getting the things out, just doing the thing, even if it didn't make it out or it didn't actually do what I wanted to do, there was so much more feedback to the thing I could actually get.

[00:11:52] I could see that, oh, people like it when

[00:11:54] it's like this, oh, it actually resonated more 

[00:11:56] like this. And I could actually 

[00:11:58] start to learn from And faster. And so by no longer letting 

[00:12:03] myself. Be, um, impacted impeded by having everything perfect before it like left my inbox and just doing the best I could.

[00:12:12] In That moment, I learned so many things faster, the 

[00:12:15] needle and the business moved so much faster. And like 

[00:12:18] even my podcast, like I took messy, actually. I'd never interviewed people like, on 

[00:12:22] air. I was like, I've done some Instagram lives. I think I could do this. You know, and the audio we had this 

[00:12:27] fancy mic and you know, it didn't even fucking.

[00:12:29] Like the first six episodes, like the it's like, it's like, I'm 

[00:12:32] talking to a mic, you can see there's a 

[00:12:34] mic there. It's not working. But like the reality is

[00:12:37] is that those are just the first six episodes and it's better for them to get out there. And then I learn from that than I like, wait until I'm a perfect interviewer, the perfect everything.

[00:12:46] Like, so I'm just a big fan of that It's so hard for people to do, but it's very freeing once you do it and you realize, oh, I didn't die. No one got hurt. 

[00:12:57] Jeremy: Mm-hmm 

[00:12:57] Lesley: and. I actually was able to learn something to make the next step. Boom, you'll start to just take more and more messy action. And you'll see that you actually can have the life you wanna live.

[00:13:08] You can literally be it 

[00:13:08] until you see it in that 

[00:13:09] messy action. 

[00:13:11] Jeremy: So let's talk about, you've sort of hinted at your, your childhood and, and upbringing and, and all that. Let's talk about how you got to where you are. I mean, you, you mentioned being an overachiever where has, has being good and, and successful at things sort of always come naturally through the hard work that you put into it or, or was that a bit of a learning curve? 

[00:13:26] Lesley: Oh, I, um, yeah. I, I co I was a straight a student, always. I think my first B I ever got was it's so shocking. Cause I'm a applied instructor, but my first B was in PE. Because I couldn't do because I couldn't do 10 perfect pushups. Never mind that they didn't actually teach you how to do a pushup. They just said do them.

[00:13:45] But anyways, 

[00:13:46] so like I 

[00:13:47] Jeremy: I love that. You're hanging onto that anger still like oh, you, you could have taught 

[00:13:52] me. 

[00:13:52] Lesley: I know, I know this name. I know where he lived everything like, yeah. , so anyways, but I, I think, I think it was a survival mode for me. I don't know that it was actually. Like my parents, weren't like always on top of me, it hasty. Perfect. But there was a level of like, you are the oldest child.

[00:14:10] You are the role model for these two as a four year 

[00:14:14] old, you know? So 

[00:14:16] Jeremy: I'm flashing to what I tell my oldest daughter right now. Oh my God. I'm 

[00:14:19] Lesley: Yeah. So I, like, I remember getting in trouble because they didn't do their part of the Cho. I didn't do my chores cuz they didn't do their chores cuz I had to do what after them. And they're like, well you should have done it for them.

[00:14:29] And I'm like, what in the world? So uh, I think the, perfectionism and overachiever was just like survival mode. Like how do I like get through the day without being in trouble? , and that is its own thing, And. I don't think I need, my parents do not need to be blamed for everything about that because there was also just I am a words of affirmation is a love language.

[00:14:51] And so when you get straight A's and your teachers talk to you and you have a hundred percent, it's like those things like you crave that kind of attention. And so that's kind of how I lived my life as an athlete. That's how I lived my life as a student and it all the way. And even through college and all this stuff until it got to as an adult running my own business, what I realized is that like being a perfectionist overachiever was costing me money and it was costing my health and it was costing me like living my life because I was like just, it had to be a certain way.

[00:15:23] And I was so high strung about that. And so once I like put a blog out with grammar errors and no one came for me, um, I was like, oh, no one is no one is actually coming to you and saying, you know what? That email you sent was so perfectly written. They're not saying that they're saying, wow, when you said this, it changed my day.

[00:15:42] So I had to start to like, reframe what that was, but yeah. childhood, , I was like a little adult 

[00:15:51] walking around trying to be perfect with 

[00:15:52] everything. 

[00:15:54] Jeremy: me, tell me more about that struggle that you mentioned the, the health problems and all, all the things that weighed you down. What, what was that experience? 

[00:16:00] Lesley: , Because I was so high strung and stressed out about making everything very perfect and trying to be a certain way I caused. And this is something that people, I, a lot of people listening probably are going through this and no one's talking about it. I actually, , ended up with stomach issues that. We're slowly killing me because what happens is when you are so stressed out, you stop going through digestion. And when you stop going through digestion, you stop going through sleep. And then it's a vicious cycle. If you're not sleeping, you're not digesting. Cuz the two things work together on the same part of the brain.

[00:16:30] So I then stopped absorbing nutrition. So here I was like eating all the healthy foods, taking all the things and like nothing was sticking. And So I'd gotten to. 20 pounds lighter than I am now. It does not like I, although in LA they love that on, on a girl. It did not look good on me. It did not feel good.

[00:16:49] Um, I felt ill, tired, exhausted all the time. And

[00:16:55] when I finally found someone who would listen to me and, actually do some blood tests and realized 

[00:16:59] what it was. It came down to I have to watch my stress and I have to get my sleep back on board. And then when I got 

[00:17:07] those two things going, then I could start, start absorbing nutrition again.

[00:17:11] And so all the fancy foods I was buying at whole foods was actually absorbing the nutrition from it. And it started to allow me to have more energy. When you have more energy, you have a lot more positivity and abilities and, and dreams in life. And so . What I really try to get people at is like you, you trying to do everything in such a certain way and 

[00:17:30] hold yourself in such a high strung way is actually, it's not just your attitude that's being affected.

[00:17:35] It's not just the people around. You have to deal with your like high strongness. Your actual cellular level is taking all that on and over. Time's going to kill. It will like, I, I, the guy who looked at me like, he's like, I don't know how you're standing in front of me right now. You should be asleep in bed.

[00:17:51] You don't have, you don't have the nutrition to get up 

[00:17:54] every day. 

[00:17:57] Jeremy: Obviously that is a glaring example of why self-care is so important. And 

[00:18:02] Lesley: Yeah. 

[00:18:02] Jeremy: I I'm, I'm gonna go on a limb and say, all of us, put it near the end of the list of all the things that we need to do. And somebody I was working with the other day shared the, the champagne fountain analogy, right Like if you fill that, that top champagne glass that's on the tower, it overflows and fills all the cups below it. While the rest of us run around, filling up the bottom and hoping there's gonna be enough left at the top. By the time we get there. 

[00:18:23] Lesley: This is the best 

[00:18:23] analogy I've ever

[00:18:24] Jeremy: Isn't it incredible. I I'd never heard it until like two weeks ago.

[00:18:26] I was like, Oh my

[00:18:27] God. all of a sudden, like, I've heard. This I've I know it it's a part of my being, but that visualization was like, that's incredible. So, I mean, that paints a picture. Your story paints a picture. But if, if you can just say more about why self-care is so important and why it, it is something that should be foundational to every day of your. 

[00:18:45] Lesley: Yeah. So, I mean, what I love about that analogy is like, champagne is such a celebratory like, event. Like, you know what I mean? There's something so exciting about it. Whereas like the air mask analogy from the 

[00:18:56] airplane, it 

[00:18:56] makes you just feel like everyone's gonna die. 

[00:18:58] Jeremy: Well, and it's that negative, right? You're you're, you're gonna die if you don't do this thing, but there's also this, like, you can also just have like this really awesome experience. If you do. 

[00:19:05] Lesley: Yeah. So the reason why self-care isn't selfish and also like I'm I I've been, I had interviewed someone on my podcast and I was like, when I was talking, I'm like, we have to, we need a new word for selfish because selfish has such a negative word. And yes, there are selfish people in the world, but like you actually wanting to take care of yourself.

[00:19:22] That's not selfish. It's actually. If you do not take care of yourself, if you are running around, just filling up everyone's glass, just all the time like what's gonna happen is you are crazy. 

[00:19:35] You're exhausted. You're tr you're gonna resent everybody around you because they're asking for more. And you're like, I haven't even filled my class at the top yet.

[00:19:44] I've just been filling yours. Well, they don't know that when we have resentment towards others, it's because we've broken a boundary, not someone else we've broken one of our boundaries. And so for me, I don't recall going, oh, thank gosh. My parents were so exhausted, stressed out and like just, because they took care of me so, well, that's not why, like that's not a memory.

[00:20:05] right. Like the memories that I have are like that I wanna keep are when I, when they were going to the, gym and walking and happy and excited, and then they had energy to take us to do things. They had energy to share time with us. And so. What I think is so important and why people need to get self care as a priority.

[00:20:24] Number one, they fill their gas tank. First. They fill their champagne glass. First is you. Are not on this planet to like run around and get exhausted and die. Like you're just not. And the people around you actually wanna experience you. They wanna hang out with you, the person that they love. You can't be that person, if you're exhausted and putting yourself third or last, like very few people are putting themselves second.

[00:20:49] If they have kids, kids are first that they have a job, then the job's there. If they have a spouse, maybe The spouse ends up third . 

[00:20:56] Jeremy: Right. 

[00:20:57] Lesley: where are they on this list? And so it's no wor no wonder that people are just running around, stressed out and tired, but like, I know for a fact, cuz I see it with the people that I teach and I coach when they get even 15 minutes of movement in for themselves, they get their priority in first they have energy, love, excitement, joy for everybody.

[00:21:15] You're so much more generous if your cup is overflow and you're like, yeah, take that. Yeah, you can do. Oh yeah, I can do that. If your cup is like barely full, you've got nothing left. Someone bumps into you. Of course you're gonna yell at them because you're like, that was the last of my champagne. right, Like you're gonna be so upset. but like, just notice who you are when you're floating at the top and your cup is filled. You just have so much more ease, energy, excitement, joy, 

[00:21:37] love to give

[00:21:38] Jeremy: So I hear the people listening to the show and hearing that and going, gosh, that sounds good. But I have a job to get to and kids to feed and a wife to take care of and the lawn to Mo and paint the house and all the things. Where do you fit it in? How, how, what does self-care look like for you? 

[00:21:51] Lesley: Yeah. So, um, 

[00:21:53] first of all, I totally 

[00:21:54] understand that. My husband And I run three businesses

[00:21:56] together.

[00:21:57] So

[00:21:59] you 

[00:21:59] Jeremy: sure there's nothing but peace And harmony. 

[00:22:01] Lesley: I right?

[00:22:02] And, and he's a night 

[00:22:03] out and I'm a morning person and we have three dogs and that are well trained and don't listen. So the I get it. Um, here's the thing, 

[00:22:13] one thing that I would say is you don't have to do it all like, remember the overachiever isn't gonna work for you. it did not work for me. It sent me into a nice little health situation. So, what if, what 

[00:22:22] can you do for five 

[00:22:23] minutes for you? Just five, Just five, 

[00:22:26] minutes for you that day. And maybe that's sitting at the edge of your bed with the light off meditating when you get 

[00:22:31] up. Right. Maybe that is while you're brushing your.

[00:22:33] teeth.

[00:22:33] You're telling yourself some amazing things about yourself. Maybe while you are doing the laundry, you put some music on to dance, but like, what can you do for yourself Right. now with the life you have? Then what happens is you get more energized, you have more excitement, you 

[00:22:47] have more joy, just a little bit.

[00:22:48] It was a long way. So then you can actually start to your eyes and ears, look for what your brain wants to do. So you start to look for where there's little gaps in there where maybe you could actually ask for help. So maybe you are married and have kids and have the lawn to Mo, but can you go Hey to your spouse?

[00:23:03] You'd be really awesome. I found Mondays before dinner, I could have 20 minutes to myself to go do this, thing. Is there a day of the week where I could take care of everything for 20 minutes for. And then all of a sudden, you each have 20 minutes now, imagine what happens. So I think what we have to do is stop thinking.

[00:23:20] It has to, like, we have to switch the schedule to being perfect. You have to do is like test out the waters. What is it you need? And then just make sure the people around you understand what you're trying to do. Hey, I'm really trying to get five minutes of intentional movement in my life every single day.

[00:23:33] Okay, great. Once you put that out there and you do it, then you can celebrate with your kids. You can celebrate with your family. And then all of a sudden that five minutes can become seven minutes and all of a sudden it's 10 minutes. And so I think we just

[00:23:42] have Something it's all or nothing. And then the other thing is like nobody actually asked you to be a martyr.

[00:23:48] No one did. 

[00:23:50] All right. No one you are doing that because you think you doing all the things in your house is what will make people happy, but have you ever asked them what will make them happy? be surprised. And as your kids get older, they can do things. They can actually do the laundry. Maybe they'll ruin it.

[00:24:07] It's gonna be okay. It's just clubs start again. But you know, like there's also some other things like I, when my husband and I got together, I had a housekeeper for a studio apartment and he's like, you have a housekeeper for a studio apartment. I said, yeah, she comes every week. And he's like, I don't think we need that.

[00:24:22] I can clean this house. And I was like, you can do whatever you want, but she's coming every week. And he had a really hard time with. Right. He just really had a hard time. So when we moved from, but then he got used to, he was like, oh wow. It is so nice to have this like clean house. And I was doing calls while she was doing it.

[00:24:36] I'm like, yeah, you were working, you were getting stuff done. So I know that, that sounds like a luxury, but like, if you think about how much you make for an hour of your time, and then you look at the things that you have to do that do not bring you any joy, they bring you none. Okay. Then I would ask yourself who can do this for less than what I get paid. .

[00:24:55] And they, it brings them. And then you you'd be surprised now you're giving money to people in the community to do something you don't like. You have this extra hour on your hand to go make more money, spend more time with your family. Just be a happier person, which means you're gonna have more happier.

[00:25:10] People just don't go like spending all the money on the world. They're like, they're like just enjoying the scenery around them and you've given back to the people in community. so it's really awesome. So I think like, I

[00:25:20] know that can sound like a luxury. I know everyone's like inflation, there's a, maybe a recession coming out, whatever, here's the.

[00:25:26] I promise you, you might have an

[00:25:28] extra 20 bucks that you can give to someone to do your grocery shopping for you. I pro like, or to pick up the dog poop 

[00:25:33] for like, just think about it, 

[00:25:34] like, look at the things you have to do and just ask yourself, where can I invest in someone 

[00:25:37] else to help me out with some extra time? And if you? just start with one thing and then you see how it goes and you test it, I promise your life will change. It really, really will. And then you're helping other 

[00:25:47] people do things that bring 

[00:25:48] them.

[00:25:49] Jeremy: It's it really is an investment in yourself. We see it as buying a luxury or buying this thing that, oh, what are the neighbors gonna think when the house cleaner comes and, and all these things that we attach to it. And, and it really is an investment in your happiness because all of a sudden you have this freedom to move and do the other things that One day you'll make time for and whatever. And I think the same can be said for, and, and I'm sure you're going to echo this as a coach, but having a coach, having somebody who's been down the road before you on, whether it's a professional thing, a fitness thing, a nutrition thing. I can tell you. After 45 years of trying to figure out what the hell to eat, I still have no idea what the hell to eat.

[00:26:24] So I I'm going to go talk to somebody and. I, you know, I've been guessing and I'm doing okay, but you know, I would like to just, I'm done guessing I want someone to just tell me, put this in your face and then go do the rest of your things because you just, you end up doing these gymnastics in your head all day of, oh God, how does my body feel?

[00:26:40] It's been an hour since I ate that thing, do I feel okay? Like I just, how much time am I wasting that I could be using in more productive ways? So, so talk to me about coaching and why coaching is such a, a valuable tool for somebody who's trying to take care of the. 

[00:26:52] Lesley: First of all, , I, yes, and I, I think it's I think there's a reason to try to do things on your own. And I think that at some point you need to figure out like, There are other people out there who are educated and they love doing it And when you invest in yourself in different ways, hiring different people, you actually pay attention in a different way.

[00:27:10] You really do. Like they say, whatever you pay for you pay people who pay, pay attention. And. There's also all like, don't go, oh, that's like a nutrition coach is so expensive. Maybe not. Maybe there's a student going through their program, who would freaking love for you to be their, their trial person. Like, there are ways of getting things.

[00:27:27] There's also such a thing as legal bartering. It's not tradings like legal bartering. So you give a service to them for a certain price. They give a service to you. You write a little contract, you write it off. Right. So there's these things. So please.

[00:27:39] As you hear me say this do not go that's for someone else.

[00:27:41] It's not, for me. There are ways. And if people who really wanna make things happen, they move mountains. So just keep that in mind. But for me, I love coaching people on what I'm an expert in, because I remember what it was like to not have those answers and how long it took me and how long it cost me to figure these things out.

[00:28:00] And so, . When I hired someone who was a few steps ahead of me, they helped me out. Then after I got to the next level I hired, someone's a few steps ahead of me again. And what's so cool is then you are not wasting time, which AKA is money that you say you don't have. On thing, on things that don't work and you also have someone to talk to and you have to, like, you literally say, like I did this and they can go, oh, that is an interesting puzzle piece, by the way.

[00:28:25] Do you know you said that last week, you just have someone else to help you recognize the patterns that you have. And so I, I think like, I wish that I wish there was a few things that were raised as children. One of 'em is be it until you see it as, uh, as like a thing to do, like how does that person do it?

[00:28:42] Okay. Now you break that down and you do it. And other thing is like, it is not a luxury, nor is it anything to be like ashamed of that you hire out support and areas that you don't know the answer it's actually like the smartest thing to do. Look at athletes. You don't, there's not a single professional athlete that we all look up to.

[00:29:00] That's like, you know what? I coached. 

[00:29:03] Jeremy: right. 

[00:29:03] right. 

[00:29:04] Lesley: I got the Olympics on 

[00:29:06] my own. No one 

[00:29:07] helped me here.

[00:29:08] Jeremy: Uh, there was some, I wanna say it was a standup comedian. I saw a bit the other day. And they were talking about the idea that, you go through, you know, 12 years of high school with teachers who are essentially coaches. and then, you know, some of them go to college And, you pay coaches to teach you things And then One day somebody says, okay, go get a job and live your life. Good luck. There's there's no more coaches now you're on your own. And then we spend, I don't know how many years going, why can't I figure this out? Why is my life so hard? Why is this sort of, because there's nobody coaching you. So if you, and it, I'm not, I'm not even saying that you have to go hire a coach, but just connect with somebody who is a few steps ahead of you be part of a community of people that are a few steps ahead of you.

[00:29:46] Look at who your friends are. If they're all in kind of the same boat and dragging you down, and you're all just commiserating with how much life. maybe find a different community. Maybe find some different friends, but, but I think that so much can be learned from just connecting with people that have been down the road before you 

[00:30:01] Lesley: That is amazing and well said. And also like, Y'all are listening to this as a podcast. So 

[00:30:07] if you don't think you. can afford coaching right now, we'll listen to the podcast of the person you wish you could 

[00:30:12] hire a ton of the stuff that they're saying on their podcast. They say to people who 

[00:30:16] pay. By the way they don't have like a different script.

[00:30:19] So like you can, now you have to do the due diligence. You're gonna have to have a figured accountability of, sorts for yourself. Maybe you're like writing reviews into 

[00:30:27] them saying, Hey, I tried that thing, you said on this podcast, like figure that out. But Like there are ways to get 

[00:30:32] coaching, like. I interviewed someone on my podcast and she said, oh, JLo's my 

[00:30:36] mentor.

[00:30:36] She doesn't know it, but she's my mentor. I look to her, I look to see what she's doing and she's my mentor. So like give yourself permission to play around with that. And then really like dive in on someone. And then as you can, like put money aside until you can invest in the actual coach, but like, there's nothing wrong with like actually having people around you that are a little bit more ahead of you in the same area.

[00:30:56] And they're, you don't have to feel like weird, like, oh, why would they wanna be friends with me? One of my best friends is a, trillion dollar strategist. That's her job. She helps strategize trillion dollar companies employment. Right? 

[00:31:09] Why is she friends with me? I make her laugh. So I, I make her laugh. I listen to her, I help her first scene and then exchange.

[00:31:16] Sometimes she answers the question I have. That's freaking awesome. So like you just have to, I think, um, what all the next per the next thing they're saying is like, okay, you too. Thanks so much. But like, how do I break up with my best friends? I'm not saying that, but you might have to put them on pause for a 

[00:31:30] Jeremy: mm-hmm. We started by talking about, be it till you see it and for somebody who's out there hearing this and going, gosh, this all sounds awesome. How do I do it? where do you start? Give me a couple of quick things I can do today to start being it till I see it.

[00:31:41] Lesley: Okay. First you need to know who you wanna. 

[00:31:44] So I just need you to like, take a moment and picture yourself. It can be one year from now. Like who do you, how, where do you wanna be living? How do you wanna be showing up? What job are you doing? Like give yourself a per a picture of you in that moment. And then I actually want you to go, okay.

[00:31:57] What's the first next step. Right, So let's say you want to be making, , $150,000. Okay. So then the first, next step would be, maybe you have to look for a different job or you maybe have to look for jobs that pay that much, or maybe you have to, , learn how to balance your checkbook. Maybe you have to review your expenses.

[00:32:15] So for everyone's a little bit over that first, next step is, 

[00:32:18] but the first step is who is it 

[00:32:20] that you want to. And then we can actually work backwards 

[00:32:24] onto what that person does. So you can have little roadmap 

[00:32:27] stepping stones to 

[00:32:28] get yourself there. 

[00:32:29] Jeremy: So much great advice here. We didn't even get into the Pilates or the breathwork or all of the things that you offer as a, as a coach and a teacher. So where can we learn more about you and everything you do online? 

[00:32:38] Lesley: Oh, well, aside from B, till you see at podcast, um, you can go to online P classes.com if you're looking for Pilates. And, um, if you're like, oh my God, that is the scariest thing in the world. Great. You need it. So , but let me de break it down for you, cuz it's a lot easier than when thinks. Um, and if you want to, uh, find me on social media, I'm at Leslie dot Logan on Instagram and my team has me on all 

[00:33:00] the things, but that's where I 

[00:33:01] like to hang.

[00:33:02] Zach: Thanks to Leslie Logan. She's a certified Pilates and mindset coach and the host of the, be it till you see it podcast, you can find links for her and her work in the show notes for this episode@thefitmess.com. You know, I, I really enjoyed that interview. I know for me personally, being the anxious body that I am. I. Constantly in fear of moving into the, whatever it is I'm I want to move into. , even just like the acting as though I am already that person and doing the things, it's terrifying sometimes, but it it's those times when I actually push through and I make myself do that where like this immense amount of growth, , just happens.

[00:33:46] And then I really do become that.

[00:33:48] Jeremy: How much imposter syndrome does that create for you when you do that? Is, is there a point during that sort of faking it part where you're like, oh, I'm so full of shit.

[00:33:56] Zach: I think early on, like once I started doing that, once I started taking that risk, because it really is a risk. To some extent, right? Um, even within our brain, , you do get used to it, but then you, start to figure out that, you know what? I am capable of new things. I am capable of growing beyond what I am today.

[00:34:18] And you start to understand that. And it becomes more comfortable. So, I mean, in the early days when I started doing it, I was like sweating bullets. Whenever I was like, giving a presentation or addressing, a group of people in some kind of authoritative capacity that I'd never done before.

[00:34:33] You know, and then like walk away and throw up. Like it was really wracking. But now today it's just like, okay, I've done this a hundred times before I am smart. I'm intelligent. Whatever it is. I'm trying to grow into. I can get there and I can do the things and it's not a problem. I'm gonna make it.

[00:34:50] It's not gonna be a problem. And I don't know, it just, it, it gets more natural over time knowing that as a human being you're capable and you're able to do these

[00:35:00] Jeremy: And, and I like that you made the analogy about speaking in front of people. Cause that's literally what she talked about is if, if you want to be the person speaking on a stage, don't wait until 30,000 people are waiting to hear from you,

[00:35:09] Zach: Mm-hmm 

[00:35:09] Jeremy: coffee shop and talk to five. Do do the reps, you know, do the work you gotta get in the practice.

[00:35:14] And that's where, you know, I think that speaks to her other main point. There is just about taking any messy action. It's okay to do it and to fuck it up and to learn from. And do better next time. Like, because you can sit here all day and, and do nothing and think about it and wonder and worry. And, oh, what if, what if, what if it goes, what if people laugh?

[00:35:33] What if it's terrible? What if, what if nobody shows up whatever the thing is, but unless you take some action, you'll never know, and you'll just be paralyzed in that fear. And so I, I, I really just appreciated that point, that. No matter what changes you're trying to bring to your life, whatever elephant bite you're trying to take. It's okay. If it's messy and that you, that you mess it up because you'll learn from it and you'll get better next time.

[00:35:56] And eventually you will become that person. You're trying to become.

[00:36:00] Zach: Yeah. And one of my, one of my favorite authors, Lee Coro he's he was a, an executive vice president at Disney for all of Disney world. Just amazing guy. He, he has all kinds of like executive management tips and tricks. I heard him say once that, like, whenever you're making a decision, whenever you're choosing to do something, just ask yourself if you can reverse that decision.

[00:36:22] You know, something set like in his world, right? Like, you know, changing sheets once every two days, instead of every day, you can reverse that. Right. If people don't like it, I'm in that situation where I need to kind of step up, I really do ask myself if I do this and I fail, is this something I can reverse?

[00:36:39] Or is this gonna kill me? Is it gonna get me fired? Is it going to destroy my family? Like something like that. And if it's none of those things, if this is something I can easily reverse and back out, Why wouldn't you. And that always makes it a little bit easier for me.

[00:36:53] Jeremy: that just, I mean, just a quick story. That was when we moved to Canada, that was one of the deciding factors is we just went, we can move. And it can suck and we can come back and it's okay. It's, it's a year, it's two it's whatever our, you know, amount of time it works out to be. But that was one of the things we're like, yeah, what's the harm.

[00:37:09] Right. Okay. We won't move back to the same house, but we can move back to the same neighborhood and the same people and all the things. So yeah, that, that is a fantastic measuring stick is whatever the decision is, whatever the thing is, you're trying to do. If it doesn't work and you wanna scrap it, that's okay.

[00:37:23] It's okay. That it didn't work out there. There will be a lesson that you learned from it that you will be better off for having learned. Then for have having sat there wondering what if,

[00:37:32] Zach: Speaking of decisions you can reverse, you should come join us in our Facebook group. It is a great place, great community, lots of things going on there. But if you don't like it, you can just leave. Like, that's the beauty of it. You can reverse that decision

[00:37:46] Jeremy: And you can find the link to join that group on our website@thefitmess.com. That's where we will be back next week with a brand new episode. Thanks for listening.

[00:37:55] Zach: by everyone.

[00:37:56] Jeremy: Oh, mixed it up. See you changed.

[00:37:59] Zach: I did

[00:38:01] See everyone now, I feel bad. All right. Complete. 

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Lesley Logan

CVO

Lesley Logan, a certified Pilates teacher, breathwork, habits and mindset coach, is the founder of OnlinePilatesClasses.com, the first free online catalogue of Pilates exercise tutorials, where you can also find weekly Pilates classes and workshops. Teaching Pilates since 2008, she has run multiple studios, has trained hundreds of people to become teachers themselves and has taught thousands of students. When not teaching from her studio in Las Vegas, Lesley she’s hosting her podcast Be It Till You See it or traveling the world leading Pilates retreats.